Sunday, May 31, 2009

I know a little something about mulligans...........

okay, okay, OKAY!

The Mother's Day blog...........Oh man, caught some heat for that one. But I am of the the notion if you can't stand the heat get out of the kitchen.

I can stand the I ain't leavin.

It's funny cause to me the blog was about truths, how to's & how not to's and terrific pictures of us having fun. But I guess it would appear if one looked at that blog in a different might feel, say......aggitated.......a little, or maybe a lot.

It's the whole men are from mars, women are from Venus issue, I guess. One of my neighbors, who is a man, actually told me he thought men understood women more than women understand men.....I just had to freakin laugh out loud in his face, cause that's dang funny. I asked him if was smokin crack, cause that is the most crazy thing I ever heard a man say. D was with me, and he told that guy to just "Stop, you cannot win this one, you are diggin a hole."

Anyway, we have had Mother's Day blog discussions pretty regularly. All over the place, my house, neighbors houses, phone conversations, x, y, & z, people just want to jump in on the notion of the blog truths or the for the greater good of all mankind trying to keep the "Man Code" manly.

After one of these discussions, where the women finally won the battle of words if not in deeds on a neighbors porch,........ the kind where you solve all the worlds problems in 30 minutes to an hour and everyone is stupid except us.....D did some some serious rethinking about Mother's Day.

The following morning, which is this past Saturday, he wakes me up at 7:00ish....He says, "Amy, are you awake?....Hey, are you up yet? I want to show you some I found this morning."

In my mind I'm all....duh, my head is laying on this pillow and my body is not moving, I am not awake yet, if you are going to show me a turtle that you picked up from our flower bed, I am going to just die twice, cause I already saw it yesterday.....

So I turnover, and what do I see? A beautiful breakfast on a tray (Winnie the pooh, but I totally could have cared less). On one side was the Saturday morning paper, on the other side was a great little jar with fresh flowers tucked in the cup holder. For the breakfast he had made real hash brown potatoes, not frozen from the bag, with the exact right amount or ketchup, a fried egg (runny the way I liked it), a terrific fluffy biscuit, and oranges that he had cut in some fancy way an twisted. It was so pretty. The butter he had scooped out perfectly with a small ice cream scooper and put it beside blueberry jam (my favorite), in this cute easy bake oven cake pan. It all went together just so special.

The night before we had watched Pride & Prejudice with Kiera Knightley with M & Z. The last scene Mr. Darcy asks Kiera when might he call her "Mrs. Darcy." She says something like only when you are completely and madly in love with me.

On the breakfast plate D had written me a card that said, "I love you Mrs. Williams".....I thought I would cry.

I ate the whole thing in peace, read the funnies, and not one kid got up until I was through with my second cup of coffee that D had fixed me.

So despite the fact I look horrid in this photograph, in fact it may even make your eyes burn.........

I owe D this mulligan. Love you Babe, breakfast in bed rocked my world, it was delicious!!!

Friday, May 29, 2009

Last night I had the strangest dream, I sailed away to China,
in a little row boat to find ya, & you said you had to get your laundry clean.......

Dreams really are so weird and random.....

I did have a crazy dream last night. You know the kind you have when you wake up even though you know it totally could not happen you still feel disturbed.

I dreamed I was younger, like in my twenties or something. I was at this like summer camp, with a hospital for children on the top....weird, I know......

So anyway, my alarm went off in the room which I was sleeping on the floor, though others were sleeping in beds.

I got up to go to the community girls shower room, plugged in my hair straightener, though my hair was already flat as a piece of paper, with my robe on. Now even though I was inside the bathroom facility I could see what was going on outside. Apparently some city water bladder tank had burst and started to flood the a tsunami.

While I was in the bathroom water started to come in on the floor like it was flooding, and then there was water coming in everywhere. So I quick ran out (I guess on top of the water some how) and grabbed the phone that was ringing on a wooden post sticking out of the ground.

It was my mom to tell me she had seen on the news that the water was flooding our camp area and was I okay. As I was talking with her another burst of water came flooding in. I climbed up this pole, literally like a monkey, that was connected to some other poles by way of metal beams, all the while holding my mom's cell phone in my hand while my mom was on the phone.

It had been raining for days........wonder why that part was in there......and the ground was saturated already, so the water would not soak into the ground very well and kept getting higher and higher. I could finally see once I was up sitting on one of the metal beams that a gal named Pam H. that I go to church with was up in the window crying, cause she thought I was going to drown.

She was holding a baby. Suddenly the "coal ash" reservoir broke again (this really happened in TN, it is a total mess, you can google it). All this disgusting tsunami gray tidal wave of water came right at me.

I could see I was not going to escape it. I was screaming and my mom was still on the phone, hearing all of this. I decided to get as bigga gulp of air as I could right at the last minute. In my dream I took one last quick breath before the water engulfed me and then there was complete and utter darkness and loud rushing watering sound all around me.

Under the water I thought, who will rescue the infants, who will go first the older child screaming for me to help her or the helpless infants who can't scream for help. I rationalized if I could get out I could carry more than one baby at a time verses only one heavy child, but could I live with the death of the child screaming for me to help them. Then I remembered I had ruined my moms cell phone.........and I woke up. troubled me that I never new if I ever came up for air and lived all morning.

Though I am obviously awake and doing my normal everyday activity today. I can't shake the drowning feeling, and last gulp of air I inhaled before darkness & water engulfed me.

I hate dreams like that, the ones that play with you all day long.

Thank goodness it was just a dream.

The other night I dreamed my dad was in my house talkng to me, I heard him clear as a bell. I looked all over for him and he was no where. The bad part is I don't even know what he was saying, cause I was to busy looking for him.


Thursday, May 28, 2009

spew, maintain, rinse, consume, gulp, lick, exhaust, make memories.......

  • kids at my house to spew some energy..............14
  • Women to maintain control of the situation & discuss how awful life would be without coffee........5
  • cans of Barbasol shaving cream used to wreak havoc on someone........37
  • pairs of eyes rinsed with the sprinkler & wiped free of shaving cream repeatedly......7
  • crazy accidents while in terrific freedom.........2
  • hot dogs consumed in active hunger.......24
  • gallons of drinks gulped down........3
  • Fun Dips eaten & licked with great happiness.......21
  • people exhausted in my house ...........5
  • people who made memories & strengthened friendships yesterday.......19

Look, it's like I farted out shaving cream