I totally gave her permission to kick me square in the butt ...........

Last Monday, not yesterday, Kacka Lacky, TN had our annual Christmas parade. I had agreed to walk with the girls in the parade because the gal who owns the clogging studio where they take lessons needed some adult chaperone's. It was cold, which was to be expected. The clogging studio got a super position in the parade sort of near the front of the line. The girls got lined up...the truck with Christmas clogging music screaming out the back of the truck bed, the "pro-cloggers" to clog all the way through the parade, the girls with the banner saying who we were, and then all the girls walking and throwing out candy...in that order.

It started to rain just as we were about get the show on the road.

.......that and the truck battery with the blaring music was dead.

Immediately the gal who owns the studio runs over to me and Ms. P and asks us if we have jumper cables. Which we don't cause she wrecked her vehicle hitting a deer and she had a rental car and I am just generally unprepared and in constant need of supervision when in the presence of any vehicles.

It has started to pour down rain now and we have lost our position. Our bags that have all the candy to throw out have gotten wet on the bottom and the bottoms literally start to fall out of the bags, spilling candy all over the streets where we stand in the pouring rain.....it's 40 degrees.

I had pathetically persuaded Ms. P into walking in the parade with me so I wouldn't have to walk all by myself not knowing anyone. um, yeah....I totally gave her permission to kick me square in the butt right in front of God and everybody.

The truck did get jumped off and despite losing our spot we ended up slap in the middle of the line in the parade. The SECC pro girls did clog all the way through the parade in the pouring rain. We did get sopping wet beyond all wetness in 40 degree weather. It was insane. In the end, it was a night I would surely remember as a sacrifice for my girls. Not only that, but even in the pouring rain Kacka Lacky town folks STAYED for the parade. I would have totally bailed if we had not been in the parade. But piles of folks lined the streets with their kids waiting to grab as much candy as possible. Our girls had a ball. I can actually say I had a pretty good time too.

D had the biggest umbrella known to man with Cole and Z waiting on us to come around. They got three full gallon sized ziploc bags of water-logged candy that night. Most of which hit the garbage the next morning for failure to dry in a manner that was eatable.

Ms. P's husband should have been in the parade he was waving us on bigger than the wavers in the parade. He was clearly excited and it made me happy to see his excitement. Her two boys, not quite as excited.

Meg and I agreed if we could get one of our kids to marry the other and have some children... some day...we could gab on about this night when we are older and grayer than we are now....cause it was surely epic.

We had to walk back to our cars at the end of the parade. Most of the mom's and a few teens could have passed for Alice Cooper.

It was till pouring down when we decided to just stop walking and call D to come pick us 6 drowned girls up under the shelter of the local car wash. He did.

My car smelled like wet vermin for like two days after that. I despise Febreeze cause it kills my sinuses, but it works so I used way too much of it.

We all got home, took hot baths, and put on warm fuzzy pajamas with slippers. It was an awesome way to end an unthinkable parade situation.


..........................
Quotes from parade night:

.....the Baptist church handing out cookies and hot chocolate earlier in the night before the parade.

D - CB, do you want some hot chocolate?

CB- No it's too hot, I don't like it too hot.

D- CB, do you want a chocolate chip cookie?

CB- No, I don't like chocolate chip cookies?

D- Well of course you don't. These are made with goodness and love by kind Christians, you probably want devils food cake.
____________

CB in the car on the way home...

CB- Yeah and then Zachary pushed me down in the street and my hat got grinched. (drenched)


____________


This is not our city parade, but gosh, it's funny....and worthy of parade catastrophe mention for sure. Listen to the folks distress when Rudolph meets his fate.

"You're tearing Rudolph!!!"....oh man...it's just ...a little funny.

This goes back to my previous blog about why do we do abnormal things at this time of year?

....like striding in pouring down rain in 40 degree weather to the equivalent of a Christmas version of Cotton-Eyed Joe....and pulling an extremely over-sized baby deer with a birth defect on an under thought out parade path that tortures town folks and little children into night terrors about it's death by gouging of an over zealous stop light.

...anyhoo, Happy Tuesday.

How about a little T M I...........

OOOOooookay, here's what happened,

Z had a game this past Saturday in Etowah. Since Etowah is located near Athens, where the Mayfield Dairy Corn Maze is located, we made a day of the time away from home.

This is an aerial view of the maze, it's ......awesome. Going to a corn maze in the fall is the epitome of southern fun, I swear.

As soon as we got there and CB saw we were at a farm he was uber excited. I mean it's really an understatement. Sarah and I had sort of already predetermined that CB was going to be a military man when he grew up....but I am not sure now... he may be a farmer.

Made of 1/2 gallon milk jugs...clever I thought.

CB questions everything.

CB- May why does that cow have milk dripping out of his belly?

M- CB, that's the cows boobies.

CB to Skylar telling a secret - Sky, see those white drippy things?...that's cow boobies.....

Sky - Cole.......shut up.

Included in the ticket is a hayride through the farm. Which was awesome, we got to see some guys planting strawberries. It was quite eye opening to see. My photos didn't come out clearly, cause I am an idiot with my camera on the wrong setting. It amounts to a tractor like machine driven by a man with two guys sitting close the ground on both sides of the machine. They are plucking ground with some tool and slamming plants into the holes at a speed that astonished me. I cannot think how many strawberry plants they could plant in a day at that rate. If the hay ride was for only that reason, I felt a little more educated on strawberry farming. I wondered what those guys got paid for such a tedious job. Plus I have had problems with hemorrhoids for about a week and a half now and all that sitting they were doing ....uuuhh I had to shake it off.

T M I fact #1 (too much information)

Also included in admission is:

* Hillbilly Pig Races

This again........southern......kids chasing around pigs with names like "Lee Ann Porkrines" "Squealy Nelson" " Justin Tenderloin" " Pig Diddy" " Clay Bacon"

* Tractor Tire Mountain, Cole loved it!

* Sand Box made with black sunflower birdseed & a separate sand box filled with corn kernels, Cole loved it. He & Sky both left with shoes full of corn and sunflower seeds

* Haybale Mountain, Cole Loved it. Run around on top of the hay bales jump in the hay filled center. Sky jumped in and held her nose.

* "Educational Silos" - cool to look at...I felt no more educated on silos when I left the dairy

Zac in the green, far left...

Sky and Cole bringing up the rear.

D celebrating because he believes himself to be the corn maze master. We got a tad lost and he got us back on track with his mad corn maze skills.

The last check point before heading to the exiting path

...still on the exiting path.....I decided to take a few last photos and lost sight of my people....

....so I started to panic about getting lost here at the last hour and decided to run and catch up.....

Z is hiding around the corner a bit, tucked into the corn where I can't see him..... waiting on me....waiting on me...waiting.....

I am running, round the corner, he jumps out of the corn, scares the crap out of me ....cause the 80's version of the movie Children of the Corn crowds my mind and ...you know....Malachi) I scream in horror.

I pee in my pants.

T M I fact #2

Z is laughing his butt off. I want to laugh but I am having to dig as deep as I can into my hold it, hold it, hold it, cross you legs, files in my mind as I can....

He is still laughing and now realizing I am now going to kill him and running. I get my bladder together and determine to choke him, but as soon as I move my bladder forgets that I have just reprimanded it and I must stop and cross legs again. My mind confirms to me a GYN visit is inevitable.

From far away Z is laughing and saying, "I'm sorry mom, I'm sorry mom, it's just so funny...I didn't mean to make you pee yer pants, it's just so funny though."

My other peeps think this funny too and recreate my screaming horror hold the pee stance.

A- Z! You are yelling that I peed my pants at the corn maze! (...I figured since peeps in Athens knew, I might as well blog about it)

We get out of the maze. I go to the bathroom and try to make "lemonade with my lemons." My people relay they will meet me at the car and are gonna have a snack before hitting the road home.

Cole makes friend with a donkey. He LOVES the donkey and wants to take it home.

D- Here CB, feed the donkey some apple.

He does and then a little more.

CB - eeeww, what's that thing on his belly?
A- CB that's his goober.
CB - eeeww gross

I swear the donkey became overly grateful, if you know what I mean, by the apple feeding.

T M I fact #3

CB- MOM!! The Donkey! LOOK! MOMMA! He has a stick growing out of his belly, I didn't notice donkeys had sticks on their bellies.

A - Ugh, What????
M- Sick!! Disgusting!! Gross!! I am outta here.....
Z- Good Lord! He doesn't even need to hike his leg to pee!
D- I can't eat over here, we have to leave that's just.....disturbing, Good God.....those must have been some good apples.
A- ....no wonder he's "ridin solo."
CB- I don't want to leave the donkey!! He's so cute and soft..... I want to stay, I don't want to leave the farm yet.

We are all just about into the car and exhausted. Cole can still see the donkey while I am buckling him into his car seat.

CB - Momma, where did his stick go?
A- Cole, I don't know, gosh.....

This concludes our "educational" tour of the dairy.

**We did not feed this animal Pringles BTW

I think we'll have a little JAM with our toast this morning....

Today I feel old school.....and I like it.

Music Playlist at MixPod.com

Excuse me Doug E Fresh yer on......

*

A little Nook..... or two, part 2........

Saturday morning D and I got up and had coffee on the back deck with each other in peace. He read his phone and I read about my new Nook through the manual loaded on it. It was awesome to hold and I felt cool.

I sort of felt really white. Here we are way up on a mountain with all this great scenery and animal sounds....and both my husband and I are stuck face down in our electronics with our perfect little children snuggled in their beds while we sit together in "peace" on the back deck of a vacation home......with our minivan in full side view.

Once the kids got up, ate, and we packed our cooler for the day, we took off for Deep Creek park.

We grabbed a picnic table, plopped all our earthly belongings on top of it and around it to be sure everyone knew this table was well taken.



I walked up the path a mile or so with them the first time, so I could take pictures of them on the way down. I knew once we got going I'd be leaving my camera behind. OOOOOO h yeah, everyone was gung hoe that first walk up, toting their own tubes & couldn't walk fast enough.

Once they put in I took off down way to catch a few shots.

This was around 10:30 am or so and no one was at the park yet. We had the run of the creek to ourselves and few other folks.

By the time we left around 4:30 pm that afternoon the park was packed. There wasn't a single parking place anywhere, trying to find a picnic table would have been a serious joke. The creek was so full of tubers that as far down as I could see, was nothing but a sea of neon orange, Santa Fe sky blue, and lime green tubes. It was the complete opposite of our first run of the day.

The water was super cold all day. This was a great help to those of us who fell off of our tubes every 10 minutes or so. D set CB up so that we could be attached to him by way of a rope which was brilliant. This way if he flipped or got to far ahead we were on him quick.

Well of course D brought him down with flying colors the first run. CB had a ball, couldn't wait to go again. It takes a little while to get back down once you put in. D announced he was going to sit the next run out and let me take CB. He would start the grill for lunch. D explained to me CB roping technique. I listened and we took off.

We are 1/4 to 1/2 of the way up. CB doesn't want to walk anymore. I am toting his tube and a heavy black tire tube (cause D and Z claimed those were the better tubes vs. the brightly colored lighter tunes. More durable = MORE HEAVY, with no handles) I am toting 2 tubes. Sky is not wanting to carry her lighter tube. Now Z is toting her tube. CB is starting to whine about he's hungry and he doesn't want to walk. It's a long walk for small stride legs.

In my show no mercy mind I'm all, Oh no dude, yer butt is going up and walkin too, yer the one who wanted to go a second run immediately and didn't want to take a break, get to steppin Larry.

Z ends up putting CB on his back and telling Sky to tote her own tube. Z hauls CB a good ways up while carrying his own tube. It takes us forever to get up cause Z and I have to keep switching off with our heavy tubes and CB and Sky and their tubes. I proclaim a minimum of 50 times that I am never getting a heavy black tire tube again...... I don't care what they say, I want a dinky neon tube with handles. I notice at the end of the day we are the only fools who even got the heavy tire tubes......not gonna do those again.

At the top we put in. I work the rope and fall off my tube at least three times cause I am just not that well balanced and coordinated enough to lay back and just work it. So I am sitting upright. This causes me to get hung up on the rocks....um...........all the way down. It makes CB worried cause it is taking so long to get down and he is cold, tired, and hungry. This young, hip, fit, hiker type couple on the side sees me working the rope. They stand up and cheer me on.....for real.

"Way to work it Momma! wooooooooooooo!!! You look like a pro! You own the creek Momma!!!!! Aren't you supposed to be sitting on the bank chillin out? "

A- YES! What happened to that?! Go get my husband and tell him I need to chill out on the bank with my Nook & a soda!

Couple - Yer almost to the bottom Mom feel the rope, be the rope!! (they LOL) You're a PRO MOM!!!

A- YES!!! (swooshing on by) I am the creek master! Go and tell the world you have seen me!!!

Couple - (laughing, hooting & cheering)

I loved them cause they must have seen me trying to be a good mom and ready to get off that tube.

So we finally get to our picnic table pull out spot and it has been over an hour since we left. My arms are killing me and CB is super cold and hungry. He immediately starts crying and telling dad I fell off the tube and got hung up on every rock. D thinks I am a tubing moron, I think cause I can't lay back and do the rope. I feel the need to sit up on the tube to be alert. Which obviously worked against me at full strength.

D has made the most delicious hot dogs and hamburgers for us. I am bow down and worship grateful. After lunch D is ready to go again. D, M, and Z sneak off without CB & Sky while they are playing around in some pools beside our table.

I am thinking I am so done today. My arms are killing me to the point that putting a pickle in my mouth seems like an Olympic event that someone should give me a medal for. I need that couple to cheer me on to raise my arms to drink my soda.

"you're a pro MOM!!! You own the caffeine free diet soda, work it, feel the soda, be the soda!!!"

We have partnered up with these older than us couples(in their late 50's and 60's). We watch their tubes and they watch ours for picture taking and bathroom breaks and general cutting up.

D has had a jolly good time at my expense agging CB on about what a terrible tuber I am and how Dad is really the king of the creek. The more CB tells of our experience down the creek, the more D aggs him on, the more the old folks laugh. Finally D takes him down one more time and then claims he is done tubing for the day. He is getting sore and scratched up also, even though he has not fallen out.

Alas the 3 oldest kids want me to go with them one more time. I don't have to take CB which is cool, so I hop up ready for some action.

I fall off and get stuck on the rocks cause I am an awful tuber all the way down. This bald man with straight white teeth is behind me steady laughing and having a barn hootin laugh out when I get hung up and flipped in this one rapid.

He hollers out, "Don't worry about it! It looked pretty Momma! (insert hillbilly laugh out)"

He hits the same rapid and flips. I hop on my tube. I am on the tube but not floating frontward the way I should be. I hollered back cause I can see his head pop up out of the water and he's pulling his pants up, "Don't worry about it Poppa, It looked pretty!" I see his smiling white teeth and bald head......his face reads that he is so busted, but a super good sport.

Z has been the gentleman on this ride down. He waited for me all the way so he could get me unstuck and help me when I fell off. When we pull out D is packing up and I am thankful. All of us are scratched up, exhausted, and sore....not just me. On the way home despite being scratched up & exhausted we are relaying constantly how fun the day was. We all thanked Maysie relentlessly for suggesting we come to the mountain house for her birthday.

It was a super good time. The whole weekend was awesome.

I have no idea why everyone called me "Momma" this weekend.

I may need to make some adjustments to my outer shell.

A little Nook....or two, part 1.......

I can't believe school starts back in the next two weeks. This is really our last week at home where noting HAS to be done. I am gonna try and catch up on a few things that require some real effort like putting some photos on a DVD.....UGH I hate freaking doing that.

It takes entirely tooooooo loooooonnng. If the DVD burner doesn't burn like it should, then I want to sever the head off the person who created the photo disk burner by way of flinging the disk at their neck frisbee style....really...... with a round house kick & a through the legs. Let it fly, watch the pretty colors as the disk glides right through my windows or maybe into some dry wall.

We went to Bryson City, NC this past weekend to D's parents mountain house. I LOVE THAT HOUSE. I swear I would have no problem going straight up Little House on the Prairie lifestyle if we lived in that house.

It's an A frame. This means, you get just what you need. A small master bedroom on the first floor, with a just enough room for one kitchen, a table for six to eat at, a small living room area and the first floor is done.

The second floor is a loft with 2 twins and a double all in one room.......just like little house on the prairie........except with air condition when you need it and 1 bathroom......oh yeah and some electricity.

I was relaying this to Z & M. They love the mountain house also but claimed they would die if they had to live there all the time. Yet, neither of them wanted to leave and come back here. They are certainly hung up in the entertainment part of life.....what about my friends, what about sports, what about cable TV, what about the internet, and this and what about that..... all of which had absolutely nothing to do with necessity for real happiness.

I guess I am expecting to much from them. I mean not having a TV and being forced to play games with each other, being outside with each other and having just enough so that it was never about being overstimulated or over indulged.....it was beautiful to me. I swear I could so live there, I really could. Just wipe the slate clean sell it all and start over right there in a spot where we have just what we need and each other.

....no baggage of the mind just the here and now......

We went there for May's 14th birthday on the 6th. It so happens me and D celebrate our anniversary the day after May's b-day on the 7th. So it was a cool time to go. May wanted to go tubing in Deep Creek. We hadn't done that in close to 8 years or so.

We had a ball.

It's Monday and I am still freaking sore as crap......more on that later.

I can't wait till we can all go back over again. No one wanted to leave.

So here's some stuff that happened. May made her own b-day cake, because she wanted to. She wanted to make a dairy free cake so Sky could eat the same thing all of us ate. I thought this was super considerate. I loved her for that....and obviously so did Sky who got to lick beaters and frosting spatula's.

Well, we forgot to bring candles and didn't get any when we went to the Ingles(Engles) We pronounce this grocery store as Ingles, as in no habla Ingles.

My friend Shay called it that by accident when she visited us in the south. She's fluent in Spanish. Since we have lots of Mexican folks here I guess she thought is was a shopping or Spanish market or something and asked us, "What's up with the Ingles?" no habla Ingles I had to laugh because that had never occurred to me before.

So we didn't buy candles at the Ingles. no habla Ingles

In true ghetto fashion we just made our own.

....long wooden stick matches = ghetto birthday candles



...ghetto candles make big scary flames initially, but then it goes away.

....there were two votives we could have used.....but they didn't match that good and we didn't have at least 4 of them for "14."......it's really all about the logic.

.....and all is well in the universe when you sing Happy Birthday really fast so that the ghetto candles don't burn down to the cake before one blows them out.

The dairy free cake Maysie made was awesome. The frosting was delicious and no too sweet. It was gone in two days, no lie.

So D picked out the birthday gift this year. No one knew what the gift was including me.

She got a Nook, an ereader from Barnes & Noble. It was a super nice birthday gift. I should know because he bought me one too for our 17th anniversary. May and I both love to read and these were very thoughtful gifts that we both will surely enjoy. I have mine already loaded up with a wish list to die for.

Nook = go broke if you aren't careful.

So though May has loaded one book already, she fully grasps the concept school books are on me & D. Pleasure books come out of her account....every time she hits the "buy" it swipes my card and in return I swipe money out of her account.

Here's a few other fun pics.....

This will do for today.

I'll post some tubing photos for tomorrow and a few Cole stories maybe :0)

good, cause he doesn't run over animals like Mom does........

This past weekend me and the fam went to Atlanta to visit my mom.

D hasn't been to "The A-T-L" really since my dad passed away, so it was good for him to come with us in about 100 ways.

Saturday my sister and I went to the Southeastern Homeschool Expo. I had a cool time wandering around checking out all the different options available to homeschoolers as far as curriculum goes.

I spoke with this gal who makes her own soap a pretty good bit. Actually so much that my sister made fun of me, but dang she was interesting to me. She actually shared her testimony with me and encouraged me greatly by sharing with me about "losing yourself" while homeschooling.

She has 9 CHILDREN! 6 have graduated and are what I would consider to be successful adults. Their jobs range from PA's, nurses, & teachers to helping her with her business on the side. Her remaining children are in high school and she MANAGES TO RUN A FREAKING BUSINESS still. I am amazed by what abilities God has placed in women to succeed. God gives them the drive, they taste a little bit of the power, then the women speed off into the sunset. It's beautiful and intoxicating to me.

These types of stories make me feel like the dreams I have are possible even if I do them just a little bit at a time. The persistence will prove tangible if only I choose to access the power and speed off........which, of course, we all know.....speeding is my thing, apparently.......I'm just not.........well.....that focused, I reckon.

Plus my sister and my mom were totally my heroes this weekend. Sometimes a girl just needs her mommy. I just needed mine. My mom filled a huge gaping hole that had been dug out. She shoveled heaps of love, hugs that sustain, and understanding without judgement.

My sister is an invaluable soul that God knew I would one day need to stay level headed and real. She is one of the most awesome people I know in positivity and encouragement to do the right things and most importantly...in the name of Christ. I love that she listened and didn't spout off nonsense to me that wasn't real. I love that she can see outside what I cannot when I need her to see it for me. I love that she is deeply in praise when I am and it is genuine.

I saw my mom and my sister walking down the sidewalk after church holding hands, on the way to the restaurant. In my mind they were the only ones on the street I could see. God shined on them brighter and all of the surroundings faded out. I could hear no sound except my mind spewing forth praise to the Lord for those two women.

We all went to Buckhead Church with my sister and her family. Andy Stanley wasn't there this past Sunday but this guy named Sean Seay was the guest preacher. He is the preacher at Athens Church in Athens, GA. His sermon was focused mainly on men. I am 100% convinced we were supposed to hear this man preach this particular Sunday.

The most important thing I learned was that if my husband feels like he is my "superhero," then he feels like he can conquer the world and will try to do it for Christ, for me and for his family.

This was not solely the message and I learned a few more things. This though, is the thing that stung enough to make me really squirm. The message was based on Joshua 24:11 - 14.

It's a fantastic message for men and certainly well worth the listen for women. You won't feel the time has been wasted at all, trust me.

Listen to the message here: http://www.buckheadchurch.org/messages

It's titled The Man I Want to Be

While in Atlanta this was certainly a highlight, but so was game night when the girls finally beat the boys at Catch Phrase......cause we so owed them from the last time we played.

Cole to Nana - Are you gonna let Daddy drive your car to get a paper?

Nana - No, he's taking your car, but if he wanted to take it I would let him.

Cole - Oh good, cause he doesn't run over animals like Mom does. (Nana thinks this is very funny)

........Grilled hot dogs, brownies & milk on the porch while my most humble and outstanding brother-in-law told us about his mission trip to Venezuela, bowling, and topping it off with a Mad Men episode before bed Sunday evening.....put an extraordinary weekend to an end.

I love my family.

I swear I do.

he has this awful red afro and way too much lipstick...........

This past Monday I took my kids and PJ to Dollywood.

IT WAS SO FREAKING HOT!

I had told the kids, "Look, you may as well just resign yourselves to being hot, thirsty, sweaty, salty, sticky, and stinky today and all day. The heat will never subside, so soak in the fun and try to keep it together."

Right off the bat Sky was measured wrong and they claimed she was still too short to ride any of the rides except the idiot ducks....which means Cole can only ride the idiot ducks. So they both got banded with kiddie ride arm bands. Sky's demeanor went down visibly and immediately. So did mine and May's for her.

The Dolly Dame claimed Sky was 1/4 of and inch to short and WOULD NOT let her slide. I was thinking about getting stupid and some other parents looked at me like I should get stupid. I did ask her if she could please just give the next up arm band, she's almost eight and doesn't want to have a season pass to ride the dumb ducks, 1/4 of an inch..... come on.....

She then pulled Sky out of line and explained to me the constitution of the United States and about all measurement regarding the shelves on the bottom of the ocean floor and tall building construction & frying eggs.

I was about to grow a beard and die twice waiting for her to shut up.

Like those times when I get a ticket.....yes, yes....I understand, you're right......hmmm.......really........yes, yes, yes...........okay, okay...........yes, thank you, fake smile, leave, cut the arm band off and hope for lesser attentive ride workers.

That was the right thing to do. BOTH Sky and Cole were quite able to ride almost every ride except the huge roller coasters. Which is fine. Because Sky was an inch and 1/2 taller than she was measured according to the marking sticks. She was able to ride a few of rides by herself. This free'd me up to ride with CB who measured repeatedly rider with an adult in tow.

When I needed another adult for Sky..........lied again and claimed PJ was 16. Which isn't that off base really, he's 15 1/2 or something. He was glad to help me out.

An adult that teaches a kid to lie is not a good thing. It had to be done though for all things great and small if this day was to be remotely tolerable for me.

Can you imagine what kind of whining I would have had to endure while two hot miserable kids complain about riding ducks, flying pigs, and some bees. Uuuuhh, no, not even going there. I felt no Jiminy Cricket about it at all.

The night before we left for Dollywood, the 5 of them were on the dock swimming after dinner and came up with a rap called Down With the Ducks at Dollywood. One kid was the beat box, two were the back ground vocals and one was the rapper...the other two of us were the laughers, cause that crap was so dang funny. I wished I had it on video, hilarious.

Cole rode some super scary rides for a 4 year old that Maysie wouldn't even ride, loved'em and wanted more. He's a brave, crazy little sucker.

Can I just say......I loved going to Dollywood with all of the young people. Even though I was the only adult, I had a blast.

When it was about time for us to head home God overflowed the bathtub and used the nice folks at Dollywood to mop it up.

I had the kids wait at the exit while I rode the tram in side of the face slapping rain, thunder and lightening, then jogged to my car. I was glad I had been using my treadmill cause I was totally not out of breath at all. I felt pleased with myself.

So I got into my car in clothes so wet that I looked as if I had jumped into a pool. I pulled the car around to get the kids who are the most amazing mind reading children ever. They had folded up the stroller, divided up the conglomeration of cups, balls, wet tennis shoes, & socks and were making haste to the vehicle when they saw me. I swear I loved them for being intuitive.

Let me just take this time to say PJ is one of the most awesome teens I know. I know quite a few cool teenagers actually, but PJ is genuinely kind, loving, grateful, respectful, courteous, and super funny. Despite the fact I corrupted him with telling lies about his age at Dollywood, I observe that he is honest and not easily influenced by others. I am glad Z has had the opportunity to hang out with him relentlessly this summer. He's an awesome influence on Z. He handles Z's strong personality & touching issues with ease as if he has handled it right along with my family forever. I will miss him when he goes home and I know Z will also.

Anyhoo.... we got stuck in Pigeon Forge traffic for entirely too long in entirely too wet clothes. My bra was glued to my body and my pants were starting dry on the top but completely hot and soaking wet underneath on my butt. We were all cold on the top and hot & sticky on the bottom. The car was starting to smell like musty corn chips. It was bad. The guys took off what they could and still be decent, Sky took off what she could and was indecent, as usual and didn't care at all.

May and I were in mind over matter mode......just focus on getting home.

We did stop at McDonald's to eat.

We're in the bathroom washing our hands and so forth......drying our clothes with hand dryers......

Sky bustin in the bathroom door - Mom! There is this totally creepy clown sitting on a chair out there and he has this awful red afro and way too much lipstick.