Wednesday, April 7, 2010

S is for accepting me for trying.........


I am on day 6 or 7 without a night of uninterrupted sleep.

It started last Tuesday night with Cole peeing in the bed at 2:30AM...remember?

Since then Sky has been having Gag Fest 2010. The days had gotten worse so I took her to the doc, who told me, "He didn't really know what was wrong with her." The doc gave her a Z-pac(sp?)antibiotic, for no reason apparently...just to keep it from turning into something else.

That was on a Friday.

Tuesday I took her back in worse than on Friday, with her pink Easter bucket in tow. It's her gagging to the point of throwing up bucket. We have had it for 2 or 3 years now. Caesar's wife, Cornelia, gave Sky a shiny new one this year, full of wonderful goodies. We'll save Cornelia's bucket for carrying good things.

The nurse was all, "Would you like to have a bag instead?"

A- No, this bucket is well christened, and besides we don't throw up in in any old bag you know? We throw up in our COACH stylin Easter bucket.

This Easter bucket is Sky's personal throw up bucket. It has its own place in her bathroom.

So they checked her for pneumonia, she's good. The doc sends her home and ups her steroids for a couple days and relays when she gets off the antibiotic and so forth we can check her sed rate again for more inflammation and go from there. Bring her back Monday so he can look at her.

Cole drank out of Sky's water bottle, he's getting sick.

Yesterday afternoon, the tree cutters cut a tree down onto the power lines..... power goes off, no one gets in or out of the abyss down here....and its hot in the house.....cough, cough, cough, gag, gag, gag....COLE PEE'S THROUGH HIS NIGHT TIME DIAPO @ 3:00AM just after getting settled back into bed after a gag-a-paloosa with Sky!

AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH, pull my hair out strand by strand with tweezers to finish off my torture!

My attitude is on the hairy edge of razor sharp sarcasm. D told me on the phone last night, as I relayed to him he could not get in to the house because of the down tree and power lines, that I have had a bad attitude for three weeks...something like this, "It's like you drank a glass of piss and vinegar and just can't put it down."

I couldn't argue with him, cause I know it's true. I am so tired, from not sleeping and going all day, that I have to try really, REALLY hard to be nice. I am doing okay most of the day, but the bad attitude slips out if just one little crack in the door opens while I am speaking with someone.

Here is a good thing though. Because the power was out, Sarah came a knockin to waste some time with me and bring me some clothes from LJ's Boutique (her son's hand me downs, for which I am very grateful). So I was able to unload my bad attitude on her without judgement and say some things that should have been left unsaid out loud and let go of them. I know I should confess those things to the Lord, as I know a bad attitude is passed on just like a smile is.

I have confessed them to Him.

.........but Sarah...... she lets me be me without holding it against me. I can really appreciate that.

I know, that Sarah knows, I am stronger in Christ, than a moment of bad attitude. She knows I will put my "glass of piss and vinegar" down, in fact pour it down the drain, if I can just ask her to share it with me first.

Sometimes she'll drink it with me. Sometimes she'll take it from me and pour it down the drain herself before I contaminate her.

Thank you Lord for sending me Sarah who doesn't judge me for a moment, but as a whole, accepts me for trying hard.

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