Wednesday, March 31, 2010
Monday, March 29, 2010
Let me see.....
Last Thursday night the angles opened up the flood gates of heaven and it rained like mad. Frogs and worms galore running for higher ground or something.
In the spirit of The Starfish Story, I threw a few back into the grass to save them. The Starfish Story, by Loren Eisley...... you know?
One day a man was walking along the beach when he noticed
a boy picking something up and gently throwing it into the ocean.
Approaching the boy, he asked, “What are you doing?”
The youth replied, “Throwing starfish back into the ocean.
The surf is up and the tide is going out.
If I don’t throw them back, they’ll die.”
“Son,” the man said, “don’t you realize there are miles
and miles of beach and hundreds of starfish?
You can’t make a difference!”
After listening politely, the boy bent down, picked up another starfish,
and threw it back into the surf. Then, smiling at the man, he said…”
I made a difference for that one.”
I brought the Friday paper into the house and announced there were hundreds of worms dying on the driveway and on the front road...."Who wants to help me save some worms?!"
(cricket, cricket.....cricket, cricket ......stomp, stomp, stomp)
Cole has on his pajamas, a coat and too big bedroom slippers, I have on my pajamas, a jacket and a do-rag on my afro. We are armed with a pair of dull tweezers and science prongs. On our mission to save the wormy world, we are out the door.
So we are wormy heroes. Cole has a cape and wormy red squiggler dance to prove it.
Saturday morning Cole got up and said to me, "Hey Mom, I think we need to go and save some worms!" He had his purple Bible man cape on and his too big bedroom shoes.
Speaking of missions....I have been on a mission to make sure my people are generally more healthy. Turns out D had some months to get on a diet and lose some weight or he was gonna get type 2 diabetes.
Anyhoo, I have been on a perpetual diet since I have given birth to my first child. So I had been on him about what to eat and this and that. He didn't really care to listen to me, cause if I am such a diet guru why aren't I loosing weight??
He had an appt with a nutritionist and he was going to do whatever they said. So I was to go with him cause I guess they figure the spouse will ride their butts & make them stick to the diet. She told him everything I had told him basically, oh and by the way, stick yourself two times a day. I had put him on a pretty healthy balanced diet before the for the appt. By the time he got the stick yourself kit and nutrition info, he'd lost 10 pounds already and his blood sugar was GREAT! I am super proud of him for sticking(no pun intended) to this and being fully committed to being aware of what he puts in his body.
The thing is, Z's One a Day is freaking BLUE dye#123456789. When you are trying to be dang healthy....why blue dye that your body can't process?? um...stupid.....
So Z tries it after he eats, he throws up....before bed, he throws up.....empty stomach, throws up...
He wants to take a multivitamin badly, but they are making him sick. I told Z, "Do NOT take that vitamin anymore it is not good for you apparently, you have tried it 3 times and you haven't been able to keep it down." So he quit.
But dang Friday, he ate 3 eggs and bacon and randomly some beef jerky & took the vitamin to soon.
Cole - Mom! Zac's throwing up in your sink!
I go into the bathroom. Z is hangin over my sink. Mind you the toilet is 2 STEPS, that is 1 1/2.... 12 X 12 tile lengths in side steps to his left.... is my toilet. He is hanging over my sink....with partially digested blue eggs and bacon backing up my sink. DISGUSTING!!!
A - SON! Why are you in my sink with your partially digested blue food?? The toilet is 2 dag gone steps on your left.....You couldn't go just 2 more steps and hit my toilet where the partially digested blue eggs & bacon could just be flushed??
Z- Oh Man! That was the delicious beef jerky too....DANG!
A- DO NOT take those vitamins any more, I am throwing them in the trash right now. I am not cleaning this up(which I know is a somewhat lie).
Z- MAN!! That was all of the beef jerky too, what a waste.....(clearly not phased by the mess, but distraught by the loss of the meat)
A- Zac clean this up, right now......clean it up well and with comet.
..leaving the bathroom I hear this...........
Z-....."I do not not like blue eggs and ham, I do not like them Zac I am...."
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
....remember? "Yank a doodle from your nose Dude, I think you gotta bat in the cave......."
Well, if you don't....... go here, http://therareamylesaurus.blogspot.com/2009/10/yank-doodle-from-your-nose-dude-i-think.html It's a crazy blog so be warned.
Yesterday in home schooling, we learned about birds.
How some birds are big birds and some birds are really small.
We talked of the different colors they come in.....blue, green, orange.....or maybe "red and yellow, black and white(they are precious in his site)"..........
They are beautiful.....“It is the beautiful bird which gets caged"...tis true, we see the beautiful ones at Pet Smart in cages all the time.....and the ugly ones at the soccer field and stuff.
What they eat.....
"The early bird gets the worm."....and sometimes the bird never eats at all.
"The bird thinks it a favor to give the fish a lift in the air"
"God gives every bird its food, but he does not throw it into the nest"......yet sometimes the bird throws itself unto us......
The conversation drifted to bird flight, migration and so forth......you know?
"Birds of a feather flock together"
"God finds a low branch for the bird that cannot fly"
"Hold fast to dreams for if dreams die, life is a broken winged bird that cannot fly"
.......howbeit some birds live on forever and never seem to die, they push forward and they fly.
"A bird does not sing because it has an answer. It sings because it has a song"..........sometimes the bird's song isn't that pleasant.....
....some birds are silent but speak volumes.....
"Poetry is like a bird, it ignores all frontiers"...however, it will not be ignored itself....
"Each bird must sing with his own throat"....or maybe not...
"There'll be bluebirds over,
The white cliffs of Dover,
Tomorrow, just you wait and see"
It seems CB was a very good student yesterday.
This is what really happened.
At the soccer field Tuesday night, Cole cut his finger. It was really more like a pretty harsh paper cut slit his fingertip. He wouldn't let anyone look at it or touch it. So for like, ALL NIGHT, he walked, ran, climbed, played....giving everyone the "Universal Hi Sign." He didn't quit "shootin the bird" till he fell asleep in his bed that night, despite the fact his finger was getting cramped.
My girlfriend , Liz, snapped this with her cell. It was just so crazy looking I had to share it. It appears he is flicking someone off while I am not paying him any attention. So dang funny to me. When I first saw this pic I laughed out loud.
....and of course, lots of the parents thought it was snickerable. I would call his name out and he'd turn around to face me to see what I needed....shootin me a bird. It was just insane looking.
There is the D factor ad libbing to go with all the insanity, and you know how loud he talks. "Cole, what do you say we go and let Obamacare fix that finger for you?"
Cole turns and looks at him, cause in his baby mind NOBODY is going to touch his finger and he doesn't know "Obamacare" - "NO Daddy!" (flickin the bird)
D - "Yeah buddy, that's how we all feel....." (shaking his head in pity like he sympathizes with Cole)
D has impeccable timing with his comments. So whether you were an Obama fan or not, it was laughable.
Stuff like this...........only happens to us.
Monday, March 22, 2010
Friday was beautiful. We finished school early and walked the drained lake beaches combing for the usual 50 huge clams in several zip loc bags and a shoe. Kids got in the water a bit and had to walk back wet as usual, so we managed to keep that tradition well in tact. While on the beach we met a new family in our neighborhood. Well actually just the mom and her young toddling girl.
They were bundled up in sweaters, socks, and shoes, trying not to be muddy.....and here comes my brood with shorts, no shoes, and mud to the calves minimum. Hollering to me from afar how they have just found "the rare beer can" and that I should come and look.....oh and this too, "Mom!! Listen!! I can make the mud make fart sounds(insert 2 children fast farting and slow farting with the mud slop & having great jolly with it)."
I had this shirt on that was 2 whole dollars at Walmart the other day, that read, "I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am." I bought a couple $2 shirts to mow the lawn in and so forth, cause you can't make a dang shirt for $2. I wondered what type of first impression I or we made on the new neighbors. It scared me a little , even though I felt we talked well, and of Christ too.
I invited her to sit under the tree with Sarah and I if she was out walking and ever saw us out gabbing. She seemed glad about the invite, but still.....clearly we seemed a contrast to one another as we stood there on the beach. She, hair pulled back neatly in a pony tail, & her daughter with mud on her pink ballet flats with precious little flowers, waving goodbye to us as we moved on......we.....shorts, boasting shirts & afro hair blowing everywhere, unable to be tamed by a flowered bobby pin, muddy, and loud......eeesh, I have to hope for the best.
Saturday, a day full of awesome.
Read the paper with D a bit, and worked on my curriculum for next year, cleaned the house a bit while he sprayed weed killer outside. I worried he was going to spray to the wrong flowers to spite me. I figured oh well, if he does I will just grow some more.
Later in the day we attended a wedding for a girlfriend named Lisa R.(now Lisa B!). It was so dang fun! This is why.....cause it was the first wedding I have been to in a while that I felt like this is gonna last.
She had great music as we waited for her to enter that made me feel joy to be at her wedding. Once the deed was done the two left the sanctuary husband and wife to the song Signed, Sealed, Delivered, by Stevie Wonder. How could one not be happy and wear a smile?
Her husband is Hungarian. He is handsome. He is a Chef. D told Andras if Lisa kicked him to the curb, he would marry him. We sat with Lisa's dad at the reception where the food rocked every taste bud in my head. The dad told us without being prompted, if Lisa didn't marry him, he would take him....we all laughed, cause we understood how good the food Andras had prepared was. Music at the reception was awesome, it was beautiful outside where we ate and watched all the little girls have their own dance party.
I had told D we'd help him get some stuff at the church set up for Sunday, so we all had to leave a bit early which kinda stunk. However, since we were in separate cars, as usual....The girls and I stayed for the cake cutting, which was a blessing straight from taste bud heaven. Lisa asked me if I wanted some to take home.........um, yes.............could you just box up the whole middle layer please, thanks.
Lisa's smile of happiness made my heart overflow with love for her. I am so glad she invited our family. I would have totally missed out on something fun & special that day.
After that we worked at the church till, 7:15 or 7:20 or something. The girls and I singing karaoke Shania Twain, Amy Grant, Kingdom Heirs and whatever else he needed us to do for him to adjust some equalizer or something...then D pretended to be a typical Southern Baptist hell, fire, and brimstone preacher so I could adjust the lapel mike for Pastor Mike the next day. Which was completely hilarious...you can ask Lauren Woody.....she caught some of that.
.....and last but not least for the icing on the perfect day....NEW MOON BABY!!!!!!!!!!!! Amazon Video on Demand gave me a freebie for New Moon cause of the pre-order DVD thing.
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Jacob with short hair SCREEEEAMMMM like a teeny bopper, and break a sweat, blink my eyes uncontrollably, holy moly, the New Moon video is about 1000 times better that the first Twilight movie in every way. As soon as I get my hands on the DVD coming to my mailbox today I hope, I am going to watch it about 100 more times....I can feel it already coming. Angie B if you haven't seen New Moon girl, you cannot have mine, BUT I will swoon with you as soon as you get your own. :oD
We'll discuss it, over a brisk 3 mile walk at the track.
Sunday....I knew Monday was coming. It was cloudy, rainy, my neck was killing me, arthritis in my hips and left shoulder wreaking havoc on my posture. It was still a good day though, just someone turned the fun volume down a bit.
We went to eat Mexican food after church. Then on to Home Depot where they had put out that black colored, dog crap smelling mulch that literally made Sky gag all the way in the door. Then I had to exercise severe restraint in the plant department. D did let me get a really nice piece of pottery to put one of Poppy's plants left over from his funeral. I hate house plants, but for obvious reasons I cannot allow this one to go uncared for. It needs a bigger pot. I love the one we got. Sky got a new bigger pot for her aloe plant also, pink and green.
This was my weekend to catch up with all the Kathy's in my life. The one, Kathy L., I have known my whole life, we crammed as much conversation in about 45 minutes as we could. I felt very satisfied that we had connected, her voice brings me nostalgic peace. I love her.
Kathy V. lives down the street but gosh, we're both moms and conversation passing each other in the halls at church during pick up and drop off isn't always enough. We stayed an hour or more after church Sunday night gabbing it up... in the rain even.... about everything from testosterone, school, musical instruments, to our possibly future illiterate youngest children, cause life is so busy we just want them to go to bed at night instead of read. Great quality time with her even if it did rain on us. Though we are both sweet, we did not melt.
As I said though I knew Monday was coming still cause it just got more and more rainy. D's work people called all night long....from 1:30am on.....I can't log on, try this, try that, turn the bedroom lights on, where's my glasses? I can't see a freakin thing, turn the valve on, turn the valve off, turn the valve on, turn the valve off........I finally went to get in the bed with Sky..... cause MAYSIE won't met me sleep with her anymore.
Sky slept all over me, all night. With her sweaty, sticky, big, magic belly in my face, on my back, on my legs.....toss, turn, phone rings, Jenny wants in the bed with us, magic belly on my back again, her fingers tangled in my hair, and so on, and so on, and so on.....and guess what? It's 6:30am.....Cole's awake.
...and I have this horrible crick in my neck. I can't turn my head without turning my whole body....I have "Aunt Helen" disease(that's for mom and Terri :oD ).
Friday, March 19, 2010
May take a second to upload, but SSSOOOO worth it!! Just be patient and watch the whole video......
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
"I don't want to go to school all day and do homework all night."
Sunday, March 14, 2010
Last night D & Sky went to a father/daughter dance in Farragut, called the Shamrock Ball. I was so excited for Sky cause it seems like all the kids are into something at one time or another but she really isn't. She spends time with her best girlfriend Abby, but other than that she kinda just does what everyone else does.
In the essence of one on one time, this was her moment.
Wearing Maysie's dress, her hair curled & sprayed, lip gloss & pearls on......she and D left around 5:30 to go and eat seafood.
That is something she and her dad have in common. They will eat all food from the sea. It doesn't matter what it is, as long as it swims and can be eaten, it shall be done.
They shared a meal and headed over the dance a bit late, but better late than never.
Z spent the night off so that left me, May & CB. I made triple chocolate chip cookies and put CB to bed early. May and I finished off a few NCIS's that we had DVR'd.
When I heard the garage door opening around 10:00 pm, I couldn't wait to see how it went. In comes Sky bouncing & announcing she is home! She smells like garlic from dinner and her eye's are sparkling. I knew she had a good time.
I wanted all the details.
- Who was there?
- A DJ or live band?
- What kind of Craft?
- Did they dance?
- Did she make a friend?
- Did he meet some dads?
- Did they win any prizes? (since this was a charity thing folks could win donated stuff)
- Were idiot moms there who shouldn't have been?
........ALL the details...
D said the dance was packed with over 100 folks surely, a DJ, and some light food stuffs & lemonade. Sky flashed her beaded craft bracelet she had made and told me they took her picture sitting on Dad's lap and that she did not fake smile(which she is noted for).
Sky told me her dad got a little crazy on the dance floor and she was embarrassed but the slow dance he was better at. She told me the "Macarena" was a stupid dance but that she got jiggy with it on "Party in the USA" and so did Dad. She relayed that all the dad's knew how to "YMCA" but she did not.
D relayed to me at the restaurant they thought he was a lawyer because he was in a suit and tie, eating in the bar area, though he told them he was not. D & Sky sat in the bar area so they could eat & scat, cause it was taking too long to get seated & they were running late.....so they called Sky the "Little Prosecuter."
D told me there was some goofy dads there but he wasn't one of them.
They did not win any prizes.
The young girls knew the dance to the Thriller song which he found wild, so did the DJ apparently as he commented on the mic about how cool it was......& quite frankly I was wow'd too. He relayed he thought the "Macarena" was stupid dance also.
D's smile conveyed to me he had an awesome time too. We will surely put this on the calendar again for next year.
As we were winding down for the night.....
- May continued to convey how not exciting her night with me was.
- Sky told her dad, "Thank you," and kissed him about 100 times and headed to bed.
- I continued to ask for every detail.
D finally told me while half asleep....."Go some where and read till your Lunesta kicks in...I have YMCA'd and Partied in the USA and I am exhausted, you are talking my head off, no more talking, I love you, goodnight."
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
It was the episode where Sponge Bob and Patrick have invisible spray paint. So Sponge Bob takes off his pants suddenly and Patrick asks him why he did that. Sponge Bob replies that invisible spray paint stains the pants. So Patrick is all stupid as usual, "oh yeah" and he takes his off too.
D- Oh great.....nothing like Patrick porno 1st thing in the morning.......
While mom was here the kids felt the need to tell on me.
See.....I don't want to spank my kids all the time. It just doesn't work on some kids. Some kids get a spankin and they understand it and don't make that mistake again, that's May. Some kids you can talk disappointed too and that is way worse than a spankin, that's Z & Sky. They want me to spank them instead of be disappointed, I never do that. Z has actually asked me to just spank him and get it over with. He hates when he is in trouble. I make them wait it out. The after effect is greater for positive momentum.
CB though, I could spank him everyday 14 times a day and then minute his mind shifts gears its as if it never happened. So I have to be creative when I discipline him, to make sure he understands I mean business. So because he likes to be where we are, I separate him from us. I lock him out on the screened porch.
He can scream, stomp and act like a motard (Z's word moron and retard). Then when he wants to behave he can come back inside. He hates to be put outside, cause he wants to be where we are.
Well Amy, why don't you just put him in his room??
...cause he plays and its fun time, there is no consequence for his bad behavior.
So they tell my mom I have done this, she thinks it awful, and "she didn't raise me to be this way." Skip forward........
Saturday morning CB is blatantly disrespecting me and needing his butt whipped(to the onlooker). If I spank his butt, he's just going to scream louder and make me madder, the situation will worsen, and it will not produce the outcome I am looking for.
So I grab him up and lock him on the porch(my magic time out number is 4 minutes, his age). Mom and D think I am horrible. They go on & on about how I shouldn't do that and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
It is ludicrous, so I let the boy inside just to shut them up. He instantly is behaving. They are still going on about it though...it's cold, he doesn't have on shoes........blah, blah, blah....
D tells me if its not all that why don't I go outside with no shoes & a t-shirt??
In the living room, right there, I yanked off my pajama pants and my shoes, I walk out onto my screened porch which is basking in the sunshine and is on hitting on 50 degrees .......
A-(on the porch in my nightshirt and underwear jumping up and down like a motard as to repeat CB's behavior) Oh it's awful out here! How can I do this to myself! The torment of the sunshine on my feet!! Oh it's awful let me in the house, please, please!!! The TORMENT(stomp my feet, bang on the door, flail my arms about)Please, please, it's awful, I can't stand this, please help me I am in such suffering and anxiety, I am going to need therapy, help me please, please, I would rather be spanked than put on the porch in the sunshine.
....CB thinks this is hilarious, he comes outside to watch & and jump up and down with me. I do this for another 3 or 4 minutes to prove how ridiculous their goings on are.
When I open the door to come back in, D is smiling with all his teeth showing, my mom is standing in the living room staring at me like I am in sheer madness....."What is wrong with you? Are you crazy? I went in the bedroom to change my shirt and when I come out you are on the porch in your underwear and pajama shirt acting like you have no sense."
She starts singing to me, "Pants on the ground, pants on the ground, lookin like a fool with ya pants on the ground." D joins in adding his merry made up verses that make fun of the whole stupid situation.
She walks outside to find...yeah it does feel nice outside in the sunshine.....that it's not so bad after all.
What is so crazy about this to me is that I am trying not to lose my temper with the child so I separate him from me in a place that will not be fun time, but that is safe.
But my counterparts think I should spank him and all will be well. Some kids just aren't "spank their butt kids." CB is one of those, he doesn't care. You could spank him all day, it is not effective. Why would I put myself through the awfulness of spanking my child to make other people feel better about the situation? I am 100% sure that is not the way to discipline him. In the end I produce unwanted results that I have to deal with everyday, all day.
Parenting is hard work, it is not for the lazy folks that is for sure. I will not be disrespected. God gave me my children to raise according to His will and for His glory. I will be sure to do the best job I can, running the race set before me. But I simply will not feel false guilt for not using the discipline others think appropriate.
I had a friend once from an Asian country. While she and her daughter were at my house with some other girlfriends, one of the daughters committed a slander against her sister to the other children. It made the Asian mother very upset that her 13 or 14 year daughter would dis her own sister for gain.
The Asian mother clearly angry to the teen - "On your knees, and don't move."
She made her stand on her knees, upright, leaning on nothing, in my hallway with her face to the wall for 20 or 30 minutes or something. My girlfriend CM and I thought maybe she had forgotten about the teen and reminded her she was still in the hallway. The mother said she knew it, and we didn't bring it up again. Have you ever stood on your knees on hard wood, fully upright, for that amount of time? It isn't pleasant. The other children where in full view of this discipline.
How ever uncomfortable that made me, I said nothing. That is her culture and the way she chose to discipline as a mother. At this time in her parenting life her children were very well behaved, they did very well in school, they loved their mother.
Her point was made and she never spanked that child to make it. Why? Because I discussed with her much later about that day.....spanking did not work with that child.....but the knee thing did.
In my mind, if CB gets locked on the porch cause he is behaving unacceptably, that's nothing. Especially when I get the proper behavioral result I am seeking in the end. It is no different than a time out........it's just time-outside.
I get a chance to cool off.......and so does he, literally.
Sunday, March 7, 2010
......we had a blast!
It's so wild to be swimming and actually getting a slight sunburn indoors while it is 38 degrees outside. This was a late b-day gift for Z, really late actually. I know he thought we'd never get there but it was worth the wait when it came at last.
This is this wave riding machine thing they call a Flowrider.......it's insane.
We took my mom with us. Even though she claimed she wasn't going to swim, she was just going to watch the kids, read her book and watch our stuff........um, okay lady..........she had her bathing suit on as quickly as we did, never picked up her book and rode the water slides with Skylar and the rest of us.
She SO had a good time.
She needed it, it was time for her to get out of town. Two days later, hot tubs, a ba-jillion climbed steps, water slides, eating, snoring, Menchies, & of course a viewing of Twilight ..........it was time for Crazy Nana to head back to "The A-T-L."
When she left Maysie said, " When Nana goes home there is a spot of joy in my heart that is gone, everything in the house goes down a few notches, I hate when she leaves."
She speaks the truth. We missed Crazy Nana as soon as we couldn't see her vehicle driving away from us.