....after I slept off all my evil.....

I am about to get my life put back together.  I hope.

This is an attempt to catch us all up to speed for the past month. It may take a few blogs though.

Amy- I have been doing my thing driving all over Hell and creation in auto-pilot as usual for this time of year.  Six or seven days a week we are going somewhere at some point during the day.  I just try to breathe my way through each day knowing somehow it all gets done.

I am still exercising my butt off....or should I say my butt on, cause nothing is still happening....on the scale anyway.  I have taken about 10 of the 16 Power classes that I need to take at at the gym in order to get the free t-shirt that labels me as a weight lifter...sort of, in my eyes anyway.  I am surely getting more muscles.  I can see a bulge in my arms where there has never been one before in my life.  My butt actually looks round like a butt should look, instead of just fading into my thighs.  My stomach is certainly more flat than it was and my pants are fitting much better and some are even a little big or too big.

The problem here is that my scale is sabotaging me.  So I had D hide it so that I could only weigh on Sundays.   The first Sunday I weighed 189.  D was happy for me cause I was finally in the 180's.  I wasn't, cause I knew the moment I ate a piece of ice I would gain 3 pounds.  He scolded me for not enjoying that small victory. In my mind I have been this place so many times that I truly am not in the 180's till it is a consistent number.

I was not too discouraged however.  I gave myself a year to do this right and I have been sticking to it.  I rarely cheat and I exercise 5 to 6 days a week 40 minutes or more.  So this past Sunday I was excited to weigh because I ate especially well chosen foods that week.  I knew I had pushed myself doing the exercise and I was hoping for a 187 minimum.

The scale said 190.  I became so angry inside that I thought I might grow some devil horns that would surely expel a blazing fury so hot they'd burn the roof off my house.  I controlled it though the best I could.  I left the bathroom, went to make coffee and get the kids moving.........and then the evil tidal wave of death and destruction that likes to throw stuff when I am infuriated hit me.

So I marched right back to the bathroom where D was blowing his hair dry, picked up the scale, stomped back to the front door, stepped out onto my front stoop, and I launched that scale as far as I could with my new arm muscles "that weigh more than fat."  I meant for it to bounce on the ground and bust every spring and gear inside of it.  On the first bounce as it hit the ground I felt a minuscule amount of satisfaction.  I wanted to throw it one more time but I refrained cause I knew I was going to church in a couple hours and I needed to get rid of this evil in me before I could praise the Lord properly for the good things in my life.

The kids get up.  D comes out of the bathroom to eat breakfast.

D- Where's the scale?

CB & Sky - She threw it in the front yard.

M- You threw the scale in the front yard?

CB- Yeah she did!  It went way over there see?!

D- (looking out the breakfast nook window) Nice distance.

A- I threw it into the front yard. Yes I did.  If anybody brings that scale back into this house I swear bad things will happen to you.  I don't know what they are, but don't test me.

When I left for church the idiot scale was in the front yard.  When I came home from church the idiot scale was in the front yard.  When I came home from the gym the idiot scale was not in the front yard.  I was so mentally exhausted from my emotional torture of weighing that morning, only to find all my good eating and exercise had been in vain....months and months of not eating delicious morsels of goodness, shin splints that wake me up in the middle of the night, sweating, sweating, sweating, pushing, pushing, pushing....only to still weigh 190....I took a bath and went to bed at 6:30pm and didn't get up till 7:00 am the next morning.

BUT, not BUTT, but.....BUT, during the Power class at the gym I had likened myself to this fairly big woman in the class, like we were equals in weight.  I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror at the gym and I noticed that I didn't look her size at all.  I mean I was still bigger than I need to be of course, but I wasn't as big as I perceived myself to be by the number on the scale.  The scale doesn't change the fact that I can feel and see a muscle in my arm that has never been there before.  It doesn't change the fact that some of my pants are too big now, not all of them, but some of them.  Those are my small victories, that I should thank God for.

I am going to choose to dwell on those things.  So I can be thankful in all things to God for giving me endurance and patience to persevere when my flesh wants to quit, the spirit in me is still willing to keep my temple, in which Jesus resides, clean and healthy.

I am not going to weigh anymore.  My sister in Christ, Sarah, told me I should pick out a pair of pants I want to get into and use those as a gage for my success. I think that is the better way to go for me.....for my family too.

I found this note hanging out of my drawer where I keep my exercise wear in my closet the morning after I slept off my evil. ( you can click on this pic to get a better view if need be)

My heart overflowed and spilled all over the place with love for this oldest son of mine.

I CAN DO all things through Christ who strengthens me...... Philippians 4:13


*

crickets marinated in camel spit on a stick or something...........

One afternoon while I was having problems with the perpetual hemorrhoid(that I am now over thank you) I had decided to take a bath. I had found my jar of TOA(Tired Old Donkey) hiding in my cabinet. TOA is mostly epsom salt. This excited me more than it should have.

I poured almost the whole jar into the tub and put the water on entirely too hot. I know the water was too hot because the parts of my skin that were submerged in the tub water were a sun burned red color. The parts of my skin that were outside of the water were a tannish brown.

Relaxing……….relaxing………………….relaxing…………………

!!!!!!!BUST THE DOOR OPEN!!!!!!

S- (with her Diary of a Wimpy Kid book) HEY MOM! Will you help me fill this book out please?

A- No

S- Mom, please…

A- No I am soaking my butt. Lock the door please.

!!!!!!!!!!BUST THE DOOR OPEN!!!!!!!!!!

CB- Mom can I get in?

A- No CB! I am burning my skin off…on purpose. Look at my legs. You see how red they are? You don’t want to burn your legs off do you???

CB- Mom…you can just put some cold water in, then I can get in with you. Besides I already heard you tell Sky you were soaking your butt off not your legs. (I wish it were really that easy to rid myself of excess buttocks.)

Cole is rolling his Hot Wheels up and down the side of the tub making this horrible, unpleasant, not relaxing noise.

S- So. What is the worst thing I ever ate?

At Easter, instead of an Easter Egg Hunt I do a scavenger hunt. Sort of a like The Amazing Race on TV with “Detours” (where the 4 siblings have to complete a challenge together before they can get the next clue) and “Road Blocks” (where they select one of the 4 siblings to complete a challenging task before they can receive the next clue).

I will try to blog on this stuff later…. if I can remember.

What is The Amazing Race without an eat something yucky food challenge?

Before Sky was really old enough to do the hunt fully, Zac had to eat 2 pieces of Kibbles and Bits dog food. I can feel you thinking, why would a parent ask their child to do this awful deed…..but hey, they don’t go to school where kids can subject them to this kind of atmosphere. Somebody has to complete the daunting task of making them "normal.".....after all, this goes under the category of "it tastes like chicken," right?


I mean for real, once this kid told me tree bark tasted like chicken. So I took a rock and scraped some tree bark off of an idiot tree and ate the flippin stuff. I really believed the dang tree tasted like freaking chicken. I liked it so much sometimes I still eat it.......fried......just kiddin.


...side tracked, sorry.

Sky is an eating machine. She loves all food… meat, veggies, tuna, sushi…if I eat it, she will too. She adores eating all creatures great and small from the sea, unlike me in this way(cause you know I like to eat tree bark....just kiddin, sidetracked, sorry).

Two years ago the food challenge was eating a ¼ of a peanut butter and mayonnaise sandwich.
(I actually like to eat this sandwich about once a year.)

May and Zac totally bugged out of the challenge and refused to eat the sandwich. I mean it was ¼ for petes sake. It wasn’t even like I asked them to eat crickets marinated in camel spit on a stick or something(or tree bark).


.....so they zoned in on “Mikey.”

Sky said she would not eat it either. I told them that the game was finished then. They would not get the next clue until the challenge was completed. Now…most parents would have given in and gave them the next clue, but I swear I’m just hard that way. This way when I need them to know I will stick to my word, good or bad…they know it’s true.

The beauty of this too is... they all want their perspective prizes. The clues have been set. They can’t get to one without the other. So it was over……no prizes. Life is like that you know. You don’t always get what you want without some sacrifice. People don’t cave in and give you what you want without getting something in return all the dang time.

Somebody had to eat ¼ of the peanut butter and mayonnaise sandwich.

Sky did it.

Maysie and Zac worshipped her for a full day. Whatever she wanted that day, they gave her…..because they were grateful that they didn’t have to eat the sandwich.

..........Back to the bathroom taking my bath……

S- So. What is the worst thing I ever ate?

A- Well, let’s see...........Think back to Easter a couple years ago….what did I make you eat that was really gross?

Then she says….

S- I don’t know, Mom. You’ve cooked lots of gross food before.

A- Sky, get out of this bathroom with that retarded book right now.

CB- Mom? When yer done soaking your butt off will you play UNO with me?

Is there really no rest for the weary....ever?

good, cause he doesn't run over animals like Mom does........

This past weekend me and the fam went to Atlanta to visit my mom.

D hasn't been to "The A-T-L" really since my dad passed away, so it was good for him to come with us in about 100 ways.

Saturday my sister and I went to the Southeastern Homeschool Expo. I had a cool time wandering around checking out all the different options available to homeschoolers as far as curriculum goes.

I spoke with this gal who makes her own soap a pretty good bit. Actually so much that my sister made fun of me, but dang she was interesting to me. She actually shared her testimony with me and encouraged me greatly by sharing with me about "losing yourself" while homeschooling.

She has 9 CHILDREN! 6 have graduated and are what I would consider to be successful adults. Their jobs range from PA's, nurses, & teachers to helping her with her business on the side. Her remaining children are in high school and she MANAGES TO RUN A FREAKING BUSINESS still. I am amazed by what abilities God has placed in women to succeed. God gives them the drive, they taste a little bit of the power, then the women speed off into the sunset. It's beautiful and intoxicating to me.

These types of stories make me feel like the dreams I have are possible even if I do them just a little bit at a time. The persistence will prove tangible if only I choose to access the power and speed off........which, of course, we all know.....speeding is my thing, apparently.......I'm just not.........well.....that focused, I reckon.

Plus my sister and my mom were totally my heroes this weekend. Sometimes a girl just needs her mommy. I just needed mine. My mom filled a huge gaping hole that had been dug out. She shoveled heaps of love, hugs that sustain, and understanding without judgement.

My sister is an invaluable soul that God knew I would one day need to stay level headed and real. She is one of the most awesome people I know in positivity and encouragement to do the right things and most importantly...in the name of Christ. I love that she listened and didn't spout off nonsense to me that wasn't real. I love that she can see outside what I cannot when I need her to see it for me. I love that she is deeply in praise when I am and it is genuine.

I saw my mom and my sister walking down the sidewalk after church holding hands, on the way to the restaurant. In my mind they were the only ones on the street I could see. God shined on them brighter and all of the surroundings faded out. I could hear no sound except my mind spewing forth praise to the Lord for those two women.

We all went to Buckhead Church with my sister and her family. Andy Stanley wasn't there this past Sunday but this guy named Sean Seay was the guest preacher. He is the preacher at Athens Church in Athens, GA. His sermon was focused mainly on men. I am 100% convinced we were supposed to hear this man preach this particular Sunday.

The most important thing I learned was that if my husband feels like he is my "superhero," then he feels like he can conquer the world and will try to do it for Christ, for me and for his family.

This was not solely the message and I learned a few more things. This though, is the thing that stung enough to make me really squirm. The message was based on Joshua 24:11 - 14.

It's a fantastic message for men and certainly well worth the listen for women. You won't feel the time has been wasted at all, trust me.

Listen to the message here: http://www.buckheadchurch.org/messages

It's titled The Man I Want to Be

While in Atlanta this was certainly a highlight, but so was game night when the girls finally beat the boys at Catch Phrase......cause we so owed them from the last time we played.

Cole to Nana - Are you gonna let Daddy drive your car to get a paper?

Nana - No, he's taking your car, but if he wanted to take it I would let him.

Cole - Oh good, cause he doesn't run over animals like Mom does. (Nana thinks this is very funny)

........Grilled hot dogs, brownies & milk on the porch while my most humble and outstanding brother-in-law told us about his mission trip to Venezuela, bowling, and topping it off with a Mad Men episode before bed Sunday evening.....put an extraordinary weekend to an end.

I love my family.

I swear I do.

For if you are for us......than who can be against us?!! ...........

Little Larry Lies A Lot - In case you are wondering, my pants are wet because a mouse pee'd on them."

which translates to this: I've been playing in the water hose without permission, the garage is full of water, my pants are soaking wet and that is why I am now in only my Iron Man tighty whitey's.

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We did this family event last Sunday evening called The Amazing Race. Like the TV show The Amazing Race, we competed against other families to accomplish 6 challenges. These challenges were of course, not that difficult. To be included in the event the family had to have a child between the ages birth to 5th grade.....we so had that covered.

The Race was catered by Buddy's BBQ http://www.buddysbarbq.com and finished with a Yancy Praise Party concert.

Check her out here http://yancynotnancy.com/ She's Awesome!

I thoughoughly enjoyed her. She had the kids singing and the parents singing and her wild pink crazy girl guitar was awesome. Skylar had a ball dancing around. At one point she had 2 kids get on the stage with her and play Guitar Hero guitars and pretend to be rockin out with her.

The one little boy I swear should totally be a rock star when he grows up he rocked the fake guitar 100%. It was hilarious!!

I am definitely thinking about getting a CD for Sky at some point.

On this challenge families had to get dressed in one of three groups of stuff as quickly and crazily as possible and have a fun family photo made. I got the goggles, Sky got Bulls-Eye.

Solve the puzzle, write the verse, get your next clue.......

We did the Cha Cha and a few other dances while waiting for others to finish the race.





D attempting his version of the Charlie Brown.

Our last challenge, working on our Family Banner. I love this photo. It's my people doing some real stuff together on purpose and for fun.

Dear God,

Help me to keep my family tight and on a path that blazes in a mighty way in your name. Help us to be strong, willing, and focused Lord. For if you, Lord, are for us......then who can be against us?!!

Amen

I swear, I love living in the south......

On Saturday night the kids and I took in a church service in Oak Ridge. The message and the worship was .........AWESOME.

I totally left feeling like I needed to rearrange the way I serve the Lord. So that as I stand before him with the gifts I have to offer Him in my service.... are handed to him like a precious, beautifully wrapped gifts that I could be extremely excited for Him to open and not like throwing them down at his feet and saying, "Hey Jesus, here's my stuff that I did in yer name hope you like it."....feeling ashamed of my service in His name.

I learned some stuff I didn't know, and it excited me. I was thinking, who can I witness too cause dag gone...God Is So GOOD, how can I not want people to know where my hope comes from!!!

It isn't that I haven't told others about Christ when He has prompted me. It's just my attitude has been luke warm, and that isn't my norm. I can't stand that feeling. It's almost as if I have taken my salvation for granted and my light only shines on the direct path in front of me in the complete darkness.

When I left Saturday night. My light was surely brighter and I felt I could see a greater distance on the spiritual path that I am on. So I could take my steps more firmly and with more confidence, knowing that I have a powerful one that lives in me and in a mighty way.

So glad I made the drive. It has been well worth it. For me and my children.

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On that same note, we spent the afternoon after church Sunday with The Powers Family. We had an awesome time swimming and catching up. We spoke of good things that made us smile. We ate hot dogs with home made chili and key lime pie with big bottles of green tea and soda. We nailed each other with water footballs in the pool, choked each other by blowing water through water noodles into each others faces, tried to float "in the peace zone," and got a little too much sun before the thunderstorms rolled in.

It was an awesome way to spend a Sunday. Everybody in my family had a great time and slept well that evening.

Thanks Powers Family for the invite, it was totally fun!!

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Side note - Mrs. Great Garden called before she came over this morning!

I was able to brush my hair, put on some light lip gloss.....and I had just finished doing my dishes and beds were made.

She didn't come in, but man, we had a long conversation in my driveway with Cornelia who also came over to get some fE fI fO fUM giant veggie's. It was probably our best conversation yet. So glad I was able to do that and redeem myself.

Later that day, the air conditioner guys came over. I had 7 kids in my house. I was just fixin to kick them out cause they were loud. They were trying to tell me it was too hot to be outside, but I am hard core.

I shoved ice pops in their hands and told'em to hit the hammock and most of them did.

So as the air guys are pulling their van to a stop and park it, I am shooing peeps out the door....7 seven of them. So PJ (King David's teen grandson) is behind me......

PJ- I hate to ask you this, but I have too.....do you have your good bra on? (insert snicker, snicker, snicker, passing me on my right and out the laundry room door. Z laughs.)

I actually have a reality check moment. Do I??

Oh yep, I do.

A- Shut it PJ. (I try to kick him in his butt before he can move, but alas he's swiftly and purposefully faster than me and down the steps)

Air Guy- (First thing he says to me) How many kids do you have?

A- I only have 4 but I swear when you kick an ant hill it looks like more right? They have a few friends over. I just keep the Lemonade cold and the ice pops frozen, you know what I mean?

Air Guys smiles, "I'm hearin ya sister."

At that moment I know I live in the south and love it.

The air condition guy did understand and he called me sister.

This is the kind of conversation that only southerners get to experience.

By the end of their job they were both sweating. I brought them a freezing cold pitcher of water and glasses for the cool beverage to go in....cause all drinks taste better and colder in glass vs plastic.

Two dirty, sweaty, southern guys, chatting with me as if they new me their whole lives, drinking my refreshing glasses of water, and thanking me with sincere gratitude. They purposefully replaced my pitcher and glasses in my garage so as to show me gratitude instead of leaving it as a mess for me to clean up when they left.

I swear, I love living in the south.

Hey! Somebody kicked over my ant hill!!.............

Dear Blog,

I am tired of settling, it's exhausting. The choice for one to settle is their own. That's why so many folks have dreams that never come to fruition.....because they settle. I have recently determined myself to not settle. I deserve better than that in the name of Christ. He didn't ask me to live half baked.

He told me to look at the ants and how diligently they work and stay focused.

“Go to the ant, O sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise.” (Prov. 6:6, RSV)

You know how when you flip up a rock or a piece of wood, or just flat kick an ant hill, they all run about? Disruption in their work = chaos....within just a few minutes though they get right back at the task of life rebuilding. Kick an ant hill, in an hour it's looking pretty close to what it looked like before....... because of rebuilding.

“Go to the ant, O sluggard; consider her ways, and be wise. . . . She prepares her food in summer, and gathers her sustenance in harvest” (Prov. 6:6, 8).

“The ants are a people not strong, yet they provide their food in the summer. . . .” (Prov. 30:25).

They do things in steps, not all at once.

While these verses speak about being lazy and procrastination, they also speak to me about rebuilding when my spiritual walk has been kicked about and scattered, disrupted. I guess I need to take a look at the ants and their diligence in getting back on track.

The ants get severely agitated at the invade of their abode and even bite sometimes when they have been messed with. The agitator quickly runs away.

.....I have so been there lately. Severely agitated at letting the temple of my soul become invaded by the distractions of the world and the thing I call church, that I have "bitten" people and even "bitten" myself. I have infected myself with my own poison trying to control things that God normally handles for me.

So I am going to start the rebuilding of my spiritual life. One piece of sand at a time, just like the ants.

More prayer time.

Better study quality.

Accessing God's grace for my iniquities and for others I need to forgive.

Not holding myself accountable for others actions, but holding steadfast to the knowledge that I don't need to chill out..... but I need to buckle down and hold fast.

Allowing myself to hear Gods guidance and not feeling guilty if it isn't the popular choice.

Having had my hill kicked over is not a normal feeling for me. Running about in desperation trying to put my spiritual house back together on my own isn't something I have done in a very long time. I can honestly say, trying to do it on my own has really sucked. I am done with that now. I won't allow myself to feel false guilt anymore. It's destroying my real ability to access the God who built my house to begin with.

While some may feel the need to run around doing whatever they please...... having their course set before them but choosing their own path as better.......accessing no guidance for fear they may have to really work...... loving the life of chaos instead the one that heaps direction and blessing...........

.......I don't feel that need to participate anymore....and I won't. It doesn't bring me joy and I don't feel the love of the Lord. I cannot live without feeling the love of the Lord, It's like my breath to stay alive.

I choose not to settle and suffocate....but to separate and be loved fully and completely for obedience to the God who has NEVER failed me.

When I have turned my back, to walk my way, He grabbed my arm sternly and said. "No! Your path is this narrow one here, get back on it."

As soon as I determined myself to do the hard thing and be face to face with my savior....I felt hope & purpose. My ability to suck in some grace became instantly easier.

I know the one who strokes my weaknesses is furious, discouraged by my choice, and will eventually turn and run away....

Hope and purpose are my first two pieces of sand......

Jesus likes children that slobber on themselves in their sleep........

CB walks in the living room with only his Cars underwear on.

He has a Staples, red "easy" button. When one presses the button it says, "That was easy."

CB walks in the living room with only his Cars underwear on. He has the "easy" button on his left breast area.

CB - Hey Dad, press my talking boob.

Dad presses......."That was easy"

D - Yeah, I heard that on one of my first dates.

...................................................................

Last week I cooked dinner 3 nights in a row.

My kids gave me a standing ovation on the third night.

I felt good about that.

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May discussing with Z regarding Z going to the beach, Z going to camp, Z going here, Z going there and so on and so forth.....

Z to May - May you could've went to the beach and to camp and you chose not to, so whatever dork.

M to Z in a geeky voice- Yeah well, I'm going to Camp Stay At Home, where we learn how to be Homies. (with her hands posed all gangsta)

I laughed.

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Cole is helping me make garlic toast for Sky to eat with dinner cause we are all eating Texas Toast. He is using a basting brush to "paint" on melted dairy free butter and garlic powder.

CB - Hey Sky, guess what?! I made you a surprise! I made you dairy free toast with a paint brush!.....and guess what??!! There aren't any hairs on it!!

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I am trying to get CB down for a nap after swimming at the lake for 3 hours after church.

He isn't having it. Tantrum and rebellion.

I pick him up like a sack of potatoes under my arm and carry him kicking and screaming to his room. He is hollering, "Jesus doesn't like it for you to put me in a nap."

A- No. Jesus doesn't like you disrespecting Momma.

CB- No Momma. Jesus just doesn't like Momma.

I put him on his bed with a firm solid purpose, covered him up, and laid down beside him for a second to settle him down. I swear in 4 minutes flat the joker was slobbering on himself.

Jesus likes children that slobber on themselves in their sleep.

I am like..........great.

One time I said to myself...."Self, there are 24 hours in a day, you shouldn't waste them."

I made it a point that whole summer to fill my time with things that were productive. I tried not to do anything that would not accomplish some significant accomplishment in my home. That summer went by so quickly I can barely remember it. What I remember about that summer was that I tried to fill my time and did so....well, too well.

Now here I am with stuff running my life and filling my time for me. As if time owns me instead of me owning my time. Productive stuff has to be done.....ALL THE DANG TIME. I just want to waste some time and don't have any to waste.

So D has taken Z and scooted off to the beach for a bit to spend some time with his mom and dad. So I have no plans to cook anything significant while he is gone. I am just going on a wing and prayer that the rest of my kids get proper nourishment while they are away.

Okay so here's something you missed......

Puppies.

One of my neighbors saw them hiding under a bush when they drove by and gave me a call. I called this gal who does some work for animal shelters or something and asked her what she thought I should do. She tells me that her husband is fixing dinner and that if I can catch them she'll come and pick them up after dinner.

The puppies are very skittish and I am doubtful I can catch them but I tell her I'll try and call her back.

I take Z and May with me for help and we do in fact manage to catch them, by way of dog food kibble for bait...they are starving. You can't see in these photos but the smallest one is so weak he can barely walk.

I put the puppies on my porch cause they are FULL of fleas and have a minimum of 5 ticks or more in each ear of each puppy, not to mention the ticks elsewhere on their bodies, some as big as snails. It really is pitiful.

I call the gal and tell her we have the puppies. She then informs me her husband will kill her if she brings one more dog home and she can't come and get them.

I am like..........great.

Now I have to figure out how to explain flea and tick puppies to D who is not keen on pets anyway. He like's Jenny and that's about it.

He gets a bit stupid on me in front of some neighbors, which I didn't appreciate. But I put it behind me cause really the little puppies are pitiful and they didn't ask to be born and dropped off in some neighborhood.

So now I have 3 sets of neighbors in my driveway plus our family. Sarah's husband pulls all of the ticks off of all the puppies, he's immediately my hero. We determine ourselves to bathe them. I bathe one, May & Z bathe one, D bathes one....then we rinse and Matthew (Sarah's hubby) re-bathes one, I re-bathe one, and May and & Z re-bathe one aaaannnd repeat one more time. They look so cute, so fresh and clean.

So now it's dark and everyone leaves. Puppies are fresh and clean going to a shelter as soon as I can find one that's open. I put them in the largest rubber maid container I own and leave them in the garage for the night.

I have to be up at the butt crack of dawn the next morning which is a Sunday. Z has an unexpected soccer tournament game at 8:00am and it'll take us a bit to get to this particular field.

I couldn't sleep at all that night knowing they were in the garage. I finally got up at 3:15 am to let them all go to the bathroom. I took them one at a time cause they liked to hide under stuff and catching all three might prove a challenge. So I take the one that can't walk good first, the other two start whining. The one female manages to jump out of the container and crap all over the garage numerous times while I am laying on my belly trying to get the little one out from under a bush...........at 3:30 am. I have to repeat this same scene three times and actually have to slither under my car at three different angles to catch one cause he moves to the other side when I almost get to him. I was all....really?!

By 4:15 am they are all back in the container and resettled. I have to get in the shower at 5:30 so I can leave by 6:30 so I can be at the field by 7:30.

So I don't go back to bed.

When I get home by 10:00 am I fix a meal for one of my favorite gals who has been in a terrible car accident and plan to get it to the church by the time church lets out. From there....... take the puppies to the Taj Mahal of puppy shelters in Knoxville.

In that cooking time Matthew & Sarah have grown attached to the one female and decide to keep her. Her name is Maeve (sounds like Mave). She is super cute and she's a really lucky dog to have great owners.

So May and I take Frick & Frack on to the shelter after I drop off the food.

I totally shed some tears when I had to hand the puppies over. The one that couldn't walk good ....I wanted to keep him.

I am never picking up stray dogs again.

Irresponsible pet owners make me SICK!

It's not that hard not to have a pet if you can't take care of one.

....more to come, I promise.

Commando, huh? Nothin like startin'em out early.........

Blogs are coming slowly these days cause I just don't have time to sit down and do them. I have them in my head and on little snip-its of paper here and there.

Here's a few quickies....

D's family has always, since I have known them, called Sherwin-Williams Paint store, "Sharon" Williams.

.......and to his mom, yogurt....has always been "yogret."

It's their thing. D sometimes will make up his own words for stores and what not, I know what he's talking about but it would be a stretch for someone else to figure a few out.

....Cole gets a "Pinocchio" in his Happy Meal from McDonald's last night (shut up Jamie Oliver. We had a soccer game in Norris that took an hour and a half to get too, and my GPS is a joke. It dropped me off the map and at my "destination" before I got there by 8 miles. I only got there by sheer blessing from God. He allowed me to see a corner of white goal netting as I was backtracking to some other fields. Sheer luck...or blessing whichever makes you feel good about my wording, you get the drift.)

Cole struggling to say "Pinocchio" calls him "Pee Yo Kin Yo."

When He gets home at 10:30 last night from the soccer game and what not, he runs in to show Dad his "Pee Yo Kin Yo."

D- OOOHH! You got a "Pin Yoke Kin O."

.....Like father, like son.

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Z pointing out that a cell tower in Knoxville is huge and he wouldn't want to jump off of that one..........Thank goodness!

CB in the back seat in a super hillbilly voice - I'ma gone clIImb all tha way up thar an see JeeeezUS.

A & Z - (fall out laughing....unexpected)

later, same car ride.......

I turned the music station cause somebody is a little drunk & he needs somebody now the singer is telling us.

Z turns the next station cause somebody needs to tell us that he is having obscene thoughts about this girl and he doesn't want to disrespect her.

I switch the to Christian station and they are static-y, switch and guess what? Someone is drunk again and they need somebody now again, same song......switch.....a few seconds pass.......

CB- Oh! I like this song, it's my favorite song. (Little Larry Lies a lot is lying cause I have never heard it before in my life & every song is his favorite song.)

Z switches it.

CB- ZAC!!!! That's my favorite song switch it back!

Z- Cole that song has cuss words in it. Your favorite song has cuss words in it.

A- You don't want to hear cuss words do you CB?

CB- I like cuss words! Turn it back ZAC!!!

Z- Cole, no, do you think Jesus would let mom contaminate your mind with cuss words? Do you want to contaminate you mind with words that are not good??

CB- I don't know Zac. I'm just a baby!

Z- (under his breath) .....you got that right.....

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This morning I am laying on my bed before I make it up. I hear Cole stomping down the hallway, so I pretend to be asleep. I am gonna scare him.

He is in my room, staring at me, quietly...walking closer, closer, right beside my bed......I am waiting to jump......

directly in my ear - MOM! YOU WANT TO SEE MY SURPRISE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I jump cause !criminy!, he has scared the crap out of me, I open my eyes and dag gone if Pee Yo Kin Yo and his big long, skinny, pokey nose isn't right almost in my eyeball about to gouge my eyeball out saying in some creepy Disney voice, "I'll never become a real boy." (It's like a horror movie where I need to scream in terror and grab my face cause Chuckie or something.)

I'm about to have a dang heart attack, I have to get up and go take an aspirin. My bed still isn't made.

.............................................

Me and May going on about how cute a bra is with these turquoise satin straps and yellow and turquoise flowers and so forth.....

Z- What?! Why do I have to hear this?!

A - Well walk away......

Z- You never have to hear boys going on in the stores about how cute their underwear are. (pretending to be a boy with a girly voice) Oh, look at these Fruit of the Looms aren't they just adorable, and the elastic waist band, oh yeeees. It's wonderful....Oh look they come in black and royal highness blue......oooohh (batting his eye lashes at us, then rolling them in disgust in the same breath) I'm outta here, I'll be in the games.

M- It's not our fault they make guys underwear ugly and boring.

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The last night of Awana. Cole was misbehaving a bit during prayer time and I went to pop his butt and grabbed a handful of butt. Apparently when I dressed the boy for church that evening I had forgotten to put underwear on him.

I pull out his britches to be sure, and all I see is bare butt. Cole smiles his buck teeth at me over his shoulder cause he hates underwear. He knows he has gotten away with something.

This dad next to me smiles big and shakes his head at me - Commando, huh? Nothin like startin'em out early.

A - "Shut it........"

It's brilliant..............

I had the most amazing Mother's Day ever this year.

The kids and I went to Atlanta, D stayed here cause he hasn't had a free weekend in weeks. He wanted to get some stuff done around the house like repaint our back screened in porch, which turned out fantastic. He wanted to chill out in peace and quiet. Although, Cornelia tried to get him to keep a few kids here for Mother's Day so I could take a few less to Atlanta.

All of the kids wanted to go this time so that wouldn't have happened anyway. We had an outstanding time.

I pulled into Atlanta late afternoon Friday so Mom decided we should go some where to eat instead of cook cause she had just gotten off work. I hadn't planned on eating out with the whole dairy free business yet. I was a tad worried about being one of those freaks at a restaurant who can't eat anything and wants the whole menu prepared special. I decided to call around a bit before we went anywhere to see if a few things had butter or could be prepared without dairy easily.

Pasta Bella - Italian - the gal was completely and blandly unhelpful on the phone.

A- My child is dairy free, I was curious does your Marinara sauce have cheese in it?

Pasta girl - Yeah, everything here has cheese in it.

A- Oh, okay, some marinara's don't so I thought I would call and ask first before making the trip over. What type of vegan plates do you offer?

Pasta Girl - ...salad??............I guess I could ask about about our marinara sauce, but I am sure it has cheese in it.

A- Don't worry about it, that's okay. (cause now, even if she did ask and it was good to go, I wouldn't go there, cause she was completely unhelpful and sort of stupid)

We ended up at Longhorns, where unfreakishly as I could, mentioned that Sky was dairy free. Could her shrimp be cooked without the tomato butter sauce? And did she know if the bread had dairy in it?

The waitress went on her personal mission to find out what could be eaten on that menu safely for Sky. She PEELED OFF THE BREAD LABEL from the box of bread that they fix and brought it to me!! So I could check it to see if Sky could eat it! It was so awesome and helpful. She was very thoughtful and careful and I really, really, appreciated it. The food was great, as were the leftovers we took home.

Saturday we had planned to go to the park in East Cobb and celebrate Mother's Day a day early with my brother and my sister's family. This was the first time we had all been together in one spot since my dad's funeral. It was an awesome day to get together, the weather was phenomenal.

We brought a picnic lunch for our people, a frisbee, woofle balls and a bat, & a soccer ball. The play was good, the conversation was fun, the sun on our skin felt healthy (at least till we got home and mom was burned), we took a small hike on their trail and took piles of pics. My dad would have had a blast Saturday. He loved being outdoors and all of us being together would have pleased him.

We spent all day at the park from about 11:00am to about 4:00pm. This will go down as my best Mother's Day ever. It was so relaxing and easy. No one fretted over what gift to give or who was fixing what for dinner, where to go for dinner, blah, blah, blah....

I loved this past weekend, the whole thing.

Sunday I got up and went to Buckhead Church/Northpoint with my sister and her family. Andy Stanley is the man, he is the coolest dude ever. The man is completely gifted in making the Bible approachable and understandable. He is clever.

He'll say he's going to read "A verse,"..... "but first let me tell you this".....then he fills in all the gaps of history, language, story telling and makes the verse come alive, then apply it to yourself.

It's brilliant.

Even my kids love him. They had the opportunity to go to the middle school worship but both M & Z wanted to go and see Andy. I didn't have to make them go to church, they were dressed, ready, and excited to go. In fact I was going to let them sleep in and they both were like, "No, I am going!" Sky went to hang out with Emma(my niece). CB, as usual, took off into his class room of kids he didn't know without looking back. He made me the sweetest butterfly with his hand prints & fuzzy balls for Mother's Day with a Proverbs Bible verse.

I loved that Buckhead Church excited all of them about God stuff and most importantly.... the Bible.

Stories I have read 100 times seem better when Andy tells them. I always want to run home and read my Bible like a book when I hear him preach. He's awesome and God has truly blessed that man with the ability to make the Bible feel relevant and important for people today who want to be constantly entertained. He's simple in jeans and a button down shirt sitting on a tall stool, with his Bible on a small table beside him...it's all about payng attention to him and the message. The message has consistantly made me feel filled with the wanting to know God better. No wonder his church has blown up like it has.

I am so glad I got to worship with my sister and Charlie, her husband, it was SWEET!!

This put icing on my delicious cake of a weekend.
















......Oh man, I am so blessed!

I can't turn my head without turning my whole body.........

I had the most awesome weekend. It was one of those weekends where everything despite a full schedule just comes together. It should be rushed, but some how time stands still and its okay that it isn't.

Friday was beautiful. We finished school early and walked the drained lake beaches combing for the usual 50 huge clams in several zip loc bags and a shoe. Kids got in the water a bit and had to walk back wet as usual, so we managed to keep that tradition well in tact. While on the beach we met a new family in our neighborhood. Well actually just the mom and her young toddling girl.

They were bundled up in sweaters, socks, and shoes, trying not to be muddy.....and here comes my brood with shorts, no shoes, and mud to the calves minimum. Hollering to me from afar how they have just found "the rare beer can" and that I should come and look.....oh and this too, "Mom!! Listen!! I can make the mud make fart sounds(insert 2 children fast farting and slow farting with the mud slop & having great jolly with it)."

I had this shirt on that was 2 whole dollars at Walmart the other day, that read, "I'm sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am." I bought a couple $2 shirts to mow the lawn in and so forth, cause you can't make a dang shirt for $2. I wondered what type of first impression I or we made on the new neighbors. It scared me a little , even though I felt we talked well, and of Christ too.

I invited her to sit under the tree with Sarah and I if she was out walking and ever saw us out gabbing. She seemed glad about the invite, but still.....clearly we seemed a contrast to one another as we stood there on the beach. She, hair pulled back neatly in a pony tail, & her daughter with mud on her pink ballet flats with precious little flowers, waving goodbye to us as we moved on......we.....shorts, boasting shirts & afro hair blowing everywhere, unable to be tamed by a flowered bobby pin, muddy, and loud......eeesh, I have to hope for the best.
















Saturday, a day full of awesome.

Read the paper with D a bit, and worked on my curriculum for next year, cleaned the house a bit while he sprayed weed killer outside. I worried he was going to spray to the wrong flowers to spite me. I figured oh well, if he does I will just grow some more.

Later in the day we attended a wedding for a girlfriend named Lisa R.(now Lisa B!). It was so dang fun! This is why.....cause it was the first wedding I have been to in a while that I felt like this is gonna last.

She had great music as we waited for her to enter that made me feel joy to be at her wedding. Once the deed was done the two left the sanctuary husband and wife to the song Signed, Sealed, Delivered, by Stevie Wonder. How could one not be happy and wear a smile?

Her husband is Hungarian. He is handsome. He is a Chef. D told Andras if Lisa kicked him to the curb, he would marry him. We sat with Lisa's dad at the reception where the food rocked every taste bud in my head. The dad told us without being prompted, if Lisa didn't marry him, he would take him....we all laughed, cause we understood how good the food Andras had prepared was. Music at the reception was awesome, it was beautiful outside where we ate and watched all the little girls have their own dance party.

I had told D we'd help him get some stuff at the church set up for Sunday, so we all had to leave a bit early which kinda stunk. However, since we were in separate cars, as usual....The girls and I stayed for the cake cutting, which was a blessing straight from taste bud heaven. Lisa asked me if I wanted some to take home.........um, yes.............could you just box up the whole middle layer please, thanks.

Lisa's smile of happiness made my heart overflow with love for her. I am so glad she invited our family. I would have totally missed out on something fun & special that day.

After that we worked at the church till, 7:15 or 7:20 or something. The girls and I singing karaoke Shania Twain, Amy Grant, Kingdom Heirs and whatever else he needed us to do for him to adjust some equalizer or something...then D pretended to be a typical Southern Baptist hell, fire, and brimstone preacher so I could adjust the lapel mike for Pastor Mike the next day. Which was completely hilarious...you can ask Lauren Woody.....she caught some of that.

.....and last but not least for the icing on the perfect day....NEW MOON BABY!!!!!!!!!!!! Amazon Video on Demand gave me a freebie for New Moon cause of the pre-order DVD thing.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Jacob with short hair SCREEEEAMMMM like a teeny bopper, and break a sweat, blink my eyes uncontrollably, holy moly, the New Moon video is about 1000 times better that the first Twilight movie in every way. As soon as I get my hands on the DVD coming to my mailbox today I hope, I am going to watch it about 100 more times....I can feel it already coming. Angie B if you haven't seen New Moon girl, you cannot have mine, BUT I will swoon with you as soon as you get your own. :oD

We'll discuss it, over a brisk 3 mile walk at the track.

Sunday....I knew Monday was coming. It was cloudy, rainy, my neck was killing me, arthritis in my hips and left shoulder wreaking havoc on my posture. It was still a good day though, just someone turned the fun volume down a bit.

We went to eat Mexican food after church. Then on to Home Depot where they had put out that black colored, dog crap smelling mulch that literally made Sky gag all the way in the door. Then I had to exercise severe restraint in the plant department. D did let me get a really nice piece of pottery to put one of Poppy's plants left over from his funeral. I hate house plants, but for obvious reasons I cannot allow this one to go uncared for. It needs a bigger pot. I love the one we got. Sky got a new bigger pot for her aloe plant also, pink and green.

This was my weekend to catch up with all the Kathy's in my life. The one, Kathy L., I have known my whole life, we crammed as much conversation in about 45 minutes as we could. I felt very satisfied that we had connected, her voice brings me nostalgic peace. I love her.

Kathy V. lives down the street but gosh, we're both moms and conversation passing each other in the halls at church during pick up and drop off isn't always enough. We stayed an hour or more after church Sunday night gabbing it up... in the rain even.... about everything from testosterone, school, musical instruments, to our possibly future illiterate youngest children, cause life is so busy we just want them to go to bed at night instead of read. Great quality time with her even if it did rain on us. Though we are both sweet, we did not melt.

As I said though I knew Monday was coming still cause it just got more and more rainy. D's work people called all night long....from 1:30am on.....I can't log on, try this, try that, turn the bedroom lights on, where's my glasses? I can't see a freakin thing, turn the valve on, turn the valve off, turn the valve on, turn the valve off........I finally went to get in the bed with Sky..... cause MAYSIE won't met me sleep with her anymore.

Sky slept all over me, all night. With her sweaty, sticky, big, magic belly in my face, on my back, on my legs.....toss, turn, phone rings, Jenny wants in the bed with us, magic belly on my back again, her fingers tangled in my hair, and so on, and so on, and so on.....and guess what? It's 6:30am.....Cole's awake.

...and I have this horrible crick in my neck. I can't turn my head without turning my whole body....I have "Aunt Helen" disease(that's for mom and Terri :oD ).

Happy Monday??