watching our kids and talking about 5 lb bags of weed..........

Last night was a tornado in my mind.

First at the soccer field, this parent whom we've had contact with in very small amounts over the years, announced this in conversation with D and I, randomly and loud:

" I have been a good boy workin for the government all these years, and when I retire in x, y, z years.....I'm gonna buy myself a 5 lb. bag of weed, and a big bag of pills, then I'm gonna sit in my lawn chair in my front yard with my gun in my lap and watch people drive by."

.....then he spit out some brown dippin spit on the grass to the side of us and smiled showing us his straight white teeth.

......and D and I busted out laughing, cause who freakin announces something like that at a soccer field in front of all the other parents.

Dip Dude also tells us later that while he was coaching AYSO one year, his wife was so upset by a game that she followed a ref to the car to kick his butt. So Dip Dude had to forfeit the next game and write the assoc. in the town in which this event occurred, an apology letter. Then he relayed to us that his daddy told him he could date a girl from Ten Mile, but he shouldn't never marry one. He was warned.

A bit later in the evening, still at the field, a super fit late forty-ish early fifty-ish man, takes to the track. He pulls his shirt off in front of the concrete bleachers built into the hillside where a lot of parents are sitting, including us and Dip Dude......watching our kids and talking about 5 lb bags of weed, apparently.

The guy had super small, blue, somewhat fitted shorts on. He set his watch and commenced a full out run around the whole dang track. As he passed, all of us parents, of different fitness levels, thin to fat, watched him as he approached our visual left. He was in front of us now, our eyes glued to him...full out running, now sweating & fully upright in his posture.....he's passing us now to the right......He has all of our attention, young and old, male and female....in the need to break our trance induced by the half naked, fit man running, full out silence.....

Me- Good Lord, look at that guy go, that fellow is cuttin some air isn't he?

D- He is clocking himself...

Dip Dude - It's gotta be steroids, nobody that old runs that fast....

We join the other parents in the hoot an holler laugh....and I hear a mother say, "I don't run that fast lest I'm chasin a kid that needs thar butt whipped.....

Dip Dude - I quit runnin that fast when I got a real job.

On the car ride home that evening.......

Maysie and Sky happened to be walking on the track as 1/2 naked running man was sprinting....

M- There was this man, that was 1/2 naked, that came running past us with his boobs shaking and he said "Hi there," like he was Buzz Lightyear.

................................

So then the fun, fun, fun, begins. Cole hasn't pee'd in his "night time diapo" in weeks. So I let him wear big boy underwear to bed.

At 2:30am he is standing in front of me wreaking of pee.

C- Mommy, I pee pee on my clothes.

A- Aw, Cole, why didn't you get up to go to the bathroom like you've been doing?

C- I was tired.

I sit up, start to pull off his wet clothing and he is truly wet from head to toe, which obviously is NOT GOOD. He is going to have to have a bath, a warm rag is not going to cut it. At 2:30am I put him in the shower, and put his wet clothing in my blue eggs and ham throw up sink to soak with the water running and some soap...that I forget to turn off by the way. D happens to get up, see it on the verge of flooding the bathroom and turned it off.

I head off to his room to change his bedding. But as all things are never easy at 2:45 in the morning, his water proof padding had shifted a bit and the waterproof mattress cover had not been put back on from some weeks back. So his soft fluff thing that sits on top of the mattress with memory foam in it has a wet spot too. Just a little one, but it will need to be cleaned too. Now suddenly, naked Cole is in his room with me. He does not smell clean.

.....unzip the cover off the fluff, drag it back to the bathroom, run Cole some warm bath water, put him back in the tub, scrub him down with soap and wash his hair, drain the water, put new soapy water back in the tub, put the top 1/4 of the fluff into the tub and commence to washing it out.

When the thing gets wet it weighs about .....500 ponds......wring it out and try to be grateful it is just a small area at the top and not in the middle or somewhere stupid, hang it up over the shower to dry and get Cole dressed. Now both Cole and fluff smell very clean, he has clean sheets on and the waterproof mattress cover is in it's proper place.

I convey to him the need to not get up at 6:30 am unless he wants to take a dirt nap. He clearly understood cause it is now 8:35 am and no where in site.

But I am in a FOUL mood when I get up cause I was never able to go back to sleep and I had a headache and when I weighed this morning I had lost no weight. Despite the fact I am eating as healthy as Derrick and walking two miles or more 3 to 4 times a week AND I had aerobic activity from 2:30am to 3:30am......D has now lost 14 pounds with NO EXERCISE.

So I spout off my agitation to him. He is all, "Well just go eat the world then and give up."

Well, that is exactly what I felt like doing except my dang jaw hurts when I eat something hard and I feel sick to my stomach when I eat something sweet. So I determine my self not to blow this, cause ultimately this is good for me no matter what. However my attitude stills sucks.

D is leaving and not kissing me good bye. "Why? Cause I am ugly and crazy this morning?"

D- It's not the way you look that is ugly.....(the attitude...but he did kiss me anyway)

My devotional this morning......Unto you, O Lord, do I bring my life......Psalm 25:1

...about consecrating my my life for this day over to the Lord...not just my money, or one hour on Sunday, not just my ugly attitude, but my whole day, my whole life fully and entirely. Turning over undisciplined thoughts, weaknesses and bad habits.....closing my ears to the noise of the world and opening them to the voice of God. Intentionally distancing myself from ungodly things in my life....like my bad attitude and some other stuff.

Thank you Lord that I do have available to me and my family healthy food to choose from. Thank you Lord for the stamina you give to me to wreak havoc on time throughout the day when I feel exhausted. Thank you for shutting me down before I really get going and screw up. Thank you for my husband who tells me I am not ugly when I feel ugly.

Amen