Wednesday, March 17, 2010

I hated high school, I am glad it's over............

Attention: This is a mind rambling that needed to be written down, it is not funny or entertaining at all.


Tis that time of year again when I should order the kids curriculum for next year.

Every year at this time I say, "You're going to school next year, cause ya'll are getting on my nerves. Let someone else deal with you, cause I am done."

Then the begging begins....."No, no, no Mom, we don't want to go."
"You haven't even been praying about it, are you going against the Lords will?"
"I promise I will sit still."
"I don't want to eat school lunch."
"I guess you want me to learn how to cuss properly."
"I don't want to ride the bus."
"I don't want to be stuck in class for 8 hours of work that really only takes 4 or 5, what a waste of time."
"I don't want to go to school all day and do homework all night."
"If you send us to school and get a job I hope you are miserable."
" I promise I will get up when you tell me too."
"I don't want to be a cheerleader."
"I like being a labeled a home schooler, it makes me set apart."
"They don't teach the Bible you know...."
"Then I will have make up work every time I have a doctors/dentist appt,"

etc, etc, etc..........

Almost all of the excuses are of course...... ridiculous.

I haven't taken the time to pray about it & obviously for those of us who went to school, a decent part of the day is spent wasting time.

I wouldn't make my kids ride the bus, and quite frankly, they can learn how to cuss properly on Wednesday night at church. Lots of those kids use foul language during Awana......I hear about it almost every week. It isn't just the middle school kids either. Some of the Sparks are well aware of how to use cuss words. Some of the youth kids go to church with their families every Sunday, they know better of that I am 100% sure, and speak undesirably in my opinion.

School lunch, stupid(I can totally see myself as a lunch lady, except if I have to be the chicken scrubber, I wouldn't like that job).

Sit still, no you won't.

Me getting a job, laughable....just kiddin......well, not really, kinda.

Though in my mind, Maysie will be in high school next year, I am panic stricken. I know I can do it, cause I just know I can(cause I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me). There is too much help & info out there to access for me to discount that. I just never planned to school the kids at home this long.

Schooling them through high school....my mind wanders to, "What about the prom?" and stuff like that. I went to the prom two years and I had a pretty lame time generally. When I say that to other mothers I get the same response. Some didn't go or had a lame time. The very few that did have a good time seem to be linked to the "in crowd." But, all of the women I polled said the prom was not a defining moment in their high school years. They expressed that was a crazy reason for sending Maysie to school......most thought I better come up with a better reason than that....this is public school and home school moms.

From polling around I learned the prom is really more about buying the dress and getting dressed up than actually attending the prom......again UNLESS, this was a crushing on some one first date sort of thing.

Yeah, that is a stupid reason, I guess. When I make a list of pros vs. cons for both public school and home school, the home school list ALWAYS looks more healthy and intelligent. The public school list looks more social in general. In the home school community it is not looked upon well to put kids in public school, but I really don't care.........sort of.

In my heart, deep down, I know they should be with me here at home, cause I only have a short time with them in the whole scheme of life. The Lord has not given me peace with sending them to school. Though I have tried to force His hand and make myself have peace, He hasn't let me entertain those feelings long.

My mind dreams of the peace and quiet of a day when they are all in the care of an institution that is deemed a safe and educational.....and more or less free child care. That seems harsh I know, but that is how my gut feels.

I could spend all day with CB doing whatever he wants, like I did with Maysie when she was a baby. He could have his own mommy time, while the others were being group cared for and educated at the same time.....plus they get fed, and I wouldn't have to cook it or clean it up. I swear I think our grocery bill would go down a little.

Doesn't that sound totally lazy? I day dream about M & Z having lots of friends and hanging out and doing this and doing that. However, when I poll folks, constantly I hear, "I hated high school, I am glad its over." I feel that exact way. I know D felt that way when he was in school.

I wasn't popular in school, I didn't do all the social clubs or have gobs of friends, though they were available to me. I had a few close girlfriends. I actually stay in touch with most of those girls. The one gal, Kim K. W. and I used to be called the "share a brain twins," we did everything together. We are still close even though we don't live in the same state. I still have dinner with Michelle B. W. when I am in Atlanta, which is never these days. I actually haven't seen her in a couple years, but I know if I did it would be cool, like we never left off.

So I believe myself to be disillusioned as to how high school would be if they went.....see how my thinking is still rambling on about the social stuff and not the education. I know plenty of great teachers here and a couple of principles too that are awesome. Being truthful though, my kids wouldn't have any of those teachers.

I don't know.......maybe being a home school mom is really who I am. I hate to be defined as she home schools, and that is how people know me.

Amy, the manic girl that home schools 4 kids.....

or

Amy, the manic girl that used to home school and now her kids go to school, she's out of the will of God, but adjusting to the discipline accordingly....

ugh, Gods discipline.........

UGH!

Let me just order some curriculum now for petes sake............

................................................................


.....later this morning, this is my devotional verse.....

Psalm 23:1-3

“The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not be in want. He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters, he restores my soul.”

See what I mean? He won't let me entertain myself long.....

God knows me, of this I am sure.


1 comment:

Linear Heritage of Women said...

I know that my high school years were not fun for me. I think that a parent wants their children to experience what they didn't have when they were young. My mom always told me that she wanted me to have this and that because she didn't have the opportunity growing up.

I know that God will resolve this situation for you. You love your kids, and that will be the most important thing they remember when they reflect on their childhood -- not if they had a great time in school, daycare, etc. At least, I know that's what I remember.