Sunday, December 27, 2009

Need yer butt wiped? Don't come here cause we are done!!..........

Hi, my name is Amy and I am a recovering blog neglector.

This is a picture of my sister, "Princess."

I am 100% sure this was the busiest I have ever been during the holidays. Even more busy than last year with the funeral and all. I kept thinking, where is Poppy in all this. I don't see his hand in the mix anywhere, you know like a sign or something. I didn't feel him in my chaos. I thought we'd all be uncomfortable or upset or something. Instead I felt most uncomfortable before Thanksgiving as if that was the "ribbon cutting" ceremony for all my sadness. Although Thanksgiving was not the dream we had last year when Poppy was alive, it was not a flood gate opened for a season of sadness either.

My mom told me of a dream she had before coming to my house for Christmas. It went something like was awakened by Poppy snoring in the living room, she went in and told him to come to bed and he did. There they snuggled together and chatted of how well she was doing and how well we were all doing and he was proud of us, and that he wanted us to have a Merry Christmas.....and the dream was over.

I do not believe that our loved ones look down on us from heaven as our angels. Clearly the Bible states angels were created angels from the beginning of time. They have a specific look and a specific function and they are truly angels. Plus I believe that if my dad or other loved ones were looking down on us they would see our sadness at funerals and other times when we are anxious or sad or whatever, and they too would long for the world and be sad themselves. The Bible clearly tells us there will be no sadness or tears in heaven. One cannot serve two masters. I believe once you go to heaven Jesus Christ is so Holy, glorious, and beautiful, that the things of this world pass away and we long for it no more. The Bible says there are things in heaven prepared for us that are so amazing we cannot even make sense of it or even think of them. This is one of those things I believe about death for those who know Christ.

However, I do believe that God can minister to us through dreams. It happened in the Bible, and I believe it happens now. I believe God ministered to my mom in that most comforting dream by allowing her to feel the love she knew threw David and giving her encouragement that was real. Her, by chance, telling me of her dream allowed God to minister to me also and see that He knows I was searching for David in our holidays and was found wanting. God let mom spill her dream to me by chance in a conversation because I needed to feel Poppy's love also. After she told me of her dream, besides being jealous she is the one who always gets to have the dreams, I felt average to okay with the coming Christmas.

My sister came for a visit the weekend before Christmas and we had a super time. I thought if my dad had been looking down on us he would have loved the time we spent together with both of our families together and complete.

My sister was a Christmas gift to me this year. God wrapped her up in a smaller, healthier, little package to come to my house and teach me not to sweat the small stuff, to say thank you to people without adding a "but," & to show me no matter how one changes outwardly they are still the same inside and it comes out in their actions. When I wanted to go on and on about how beautiful she was, her eyes told me to stop....and I did..... cause she has always been beautiful.........and funny and smart and funny and truthful and funny.

I am so blessed God gave her to me.

Our kids have gotten older we didn't spend our time wiping butts, brushing teeth, bathing, and breaking up childish spats.

We have arrived!!!

......freakin finally ;oD


Gena said...

Amy, your sister is beautiful but that is no suprise because so are you. I am so glad you had a happy Christmas because I love you and I want you to be happy!

Linear Heritage of Women said...

Amy, you should read our new book when it comes out this year "Linear Heritage of Women." We talk about dreams like your mom had and what we believe our loved ones are like in heaven.